DECEMBER 30, 2007

Full News Archive

• Headline: Nuns Embrace Arts for Monastery Support. Impact: If these nuns hadn’t embraced the arts, we might have been deprived of a whole genre of nun-themed films and songs. Picture the world without 'Sister Act'—a tragedy on par with the loss of the original moon landing footage.. Fact: Did you know that before this nunnery became artsy, their main creative outlet was crafting holy water into artisanal bath bombs? Talk about a spiritual cleanse!.
• Headline: Mice's Claim to the Hill. Impact: This headline reveals the deep-seated rivalry between humans and mice, which eventually leads to a new reality show: 'Survivor: Urban Wildlife Edition.' The fate of humanity will be determined by who can outsmart the rodent overlords.. Fact: Did you know that mice are capable of learning and can even recognize their names? So, if you’re calling them pests, they might just be plotting their revenge!.
• Headline: The World of Tomorrow. Impact: The visions of ten New Yorkers about 2108 will inevitably lead to the creation of a dystopian reality where everyone rides hoverboards and has to navigate around the 'No Flying Zones' established because of too much hoverboard traffic.. Fact: Did you know that by 2108, the average person is predicted to have spent over 75% of their life in virtual meetings? So, if you're tired of Zoom now, buckle up for a future of holographic awkwardness!.
• Headline: A Strategy Up Their Sleeves. Impact: This daring card-counting escapade inspired a wave of not-so-smart criminals who thought they could apply the same strategy to life decisions. Spoiler alert: Counting cards does not translate to counting calories.. Fact: Did you know that card counting isn’t illegal, but casinos will throw you out faster than a bad magician at a kid's party? So, next time you’re on a losing streak, just blame the house!.