JULY 15, 2007

Full News Archive

• Headline: The Energy Efficiency Challenge in NYC. Impact: If NYC had magically fixed its energy efficiency in the 90s, we might have seen a world where 'eco-friendly' became a fashion statement instead of just a hipster trend. One can only imagine how much less smug we'd all be about our reusable straws.. Fact: Did you know that New Yorkers still think walking is a form of exercise? Who needs a gym when you have the subway stairs?.
• Headline: Historic Settlement in LA Abuse Cases. Impact: This settlement not only forced the Church to cough up a massive sum but also made future generations wonder why they didn't invest in better decision-making skills instead of hiding behind their gilded walls. Thanks to this, lawsuits became the preferred method of resolving moral dilemmas.. Fact: Fun fact: This payout could buy a small country or fund an endless supply of therapy sessions. Irony, anyone?.
• Headline: North Korea Claims Reactor Shutdown. Impact: North Korea shutting down a nuclear reactor is like a toddler deciding not to throw their blocks. It might look peaceful now, but who knows when the next tantrum will strike? The world continues to hold its breath, waiting for the next dramatic episode of 'As the Peninsula Turns.'. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more unpredictable than North Korea's nuclear plans is the weather in the region? Both keep everyone on their toes!.
• Headline: Romancing the (Dirt) Road. Impact: Debating dirt road paving could very well lead to Connecticut becoming the epicenter of rural hipster culture. You know, the kind where people pay a premium for 'authentic' dirt experiences while sipping artisanal coffee made from beans grown in their own backyard.. Fact: Did you know that some people actually prefer dirt roads for their 'rustic charm'? Apparently, potholes are the new black!.