APRIL 30, 2007

Full News Archive

• Headline: Rise of Mobile Social Networking Revolution. Impact: The advent of mobile social networking set off a chain reaction where everyone felt the need to share their breakfast choices, inadvertently making 'what's for brunch?' the most debated topic in history, leading to the first brunch wars.. Fact: Did you know that before social media, people actually had to talk to each other face-to-face? Shocking, I know!.
• Headline: Iran and U.S. Meet on Iraq Violence. Impact: This meeting could have led to a world where Iran and the U.S. became best buddies, leading to the first-ever Middle Eastern sitcom 'Friends: Iraq Edition'. Instead, it just became another episode of 'How to Not Get Along 101'.. Fact: Did you know that diplomatic meetings are like awkward family reunions? Everyone shows up, but nobody really wants to be there..
• Headline: Minky Viagra? Pfizer Doesn’t Want You to Understand It, Just Buy It. Impact: Pfizer's marketing tactics might have inspired other companies to create more bizarre products, leading to a future filled with 'Minky Aspirin' and 'Fluffy Antidepressants', creating a wildly confusing pharmacy experience.. Fact: Did you know that Viagra was initially developed for heart issues? Turns out, hearts aren’t the only things that need a little boost!.
• Headline: P.E. Classes Turn to Video Game That Works Legs. Impact: If Dance Dance Revolution had taken off in every school, we might have ended up with a generation of kids who are fitter but also way too obsessed with rhythm games, potentially leading to a future where dance-offs decide world leaders.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more awkward than watching kids play DDR is watching adults attempt to join in? Spoiler: it’s not pretty..