JANUARY 6, 2007

Full News Archive

• Headline: Coaches' Respect Beyond Competition. Impact: Had Edwards and Dungy had a terrible falling out, it could have sparked a nationwide trend of coaches hating each other, ultimately leading to the decline of sportsmanship and the rise of reality shows starring bitter coaches in the future.. Fact: Despite their camaraderie, neither coach ever agreed on the best pizza topping. This crucial disagreement has since been blamed for several missed field goals..
• Headline: Japan's Innovative Energy Conservation Strategies. Impact: Japan's energy efficiency could have inspired a global movement towards sustainability, but instead, it mostly led to people arguing over whether to recycle pizza boxes.. Fact: Japan's energy-saving technology is so advanced that they can now power their entire country with just the enthusiasm of one anime character..
• Headline: Parking Patrol Under Siege in San Francisco. Impact: If San Franciscans had channeled their rage into a well-organized protest, we might have seen a new social movement: ‘The Movement for Ticket-Free Zones’ that could have revolutionized urban parking forever.. Fact: 28 attacks in one year? I guess the parking patrol were the real-life superheroes, saving the world from the tyranny of parking tickets, one slap at a time..
• Headline: Tipping Over a Defense of Enron. Impact: Gladwell's defense of Enron could have ignited a new wave of corporate justifications for shady behavior, leading to the invention of a new genre: 'Corporate Self-Help Books for the Morally Ambiguous'.. Fact: Enron’s downfall was so spectacular that it’s been suggested as a plot for a futuristic dystopian movie, where the twist is that they actually win in the end..