AUGUST 11, 2006

Full News Archive

• Headline: The Rise of Nearby Second Homes. Impact: As more people bought second homes just a stone's throw away from their primary residences, real estate prices skyrocketed, leading to the invention of the term 'temporary homelessness' for those who can’t afford a second home but still want the bragging rights.. Fact: Did you know that having a second home is the modern equivalent of having a pet rock? They're both pointless but give you something to talk about at dinner parties..
• Headline: Terror Plot Disrupted; Security Heightened. Impact: The increased airport security measures implemented after the plot were so thorough that, decades later, travelers are still being asked to remove their shoes and belts, leading to a global shoe-free airport movement that has yet to gain traction.. Fact: Did you know that the man who invented the TSA line also invented the term 'better safe than sorry'? Spoiler alert: he was neither..
• Headline: On Route 20, Where the Past Is Present. Impact: The preservation of Route 20 led to a sudden surge in nostalgia tourism, where people began traveling to see 'the good old days,' inadvertently leading to a rise in fanny packs and other fashion disasters.. Fact: Did you know that Route 20 is so long that it actually has its own time zone? Just kidding, but it might as well with how slow some of those buildings are to change..
• Headline: Teenager Fatally Shot by Father of 2nd Youth in a Confrontation. Impact: This tragic event sparked conversations around teen safety and parental responsibility, leading to countless awkward family dinners where parents tried to bond over 'how to not accidentally shoot your child's friends'.. Fact: Did you know that in the 21st century, talking about gun safety is still more uncomfortable than discussing your ex at a family gathering? It's a tragic irony!.