MAY 27, 2006

Full News Archive

• Headline: Surveillance Impact on Brooklyn Muslims. Impact: The distrust between police and the Muslim community could lead to a future where community watch programs are run by cats. After all, they seem to be better at keeping an eye on things without making everyone feel like they’re under constant surveillance.. Fact: Did you know that New York City has more cameras than people? You could get lost in a crowd, but the cameras will still find you. Privacy? What’s that?.
• Headline: Rookie Sensation Johnson Shines Against Mets. Impact: Josh Johnson's rookie success could inspire a new generation of pitchers who think they can take down the Mets with nothing but sheer talent and a dash of luck. This could lead to a Mets' existential crisis where they question their place in the universe.. Fact: Did you know that the Mets have won two World Series championships? But honestly, it's mostly about how many times they can make fans question their life choices..
• Headline: Woods Decides Not to Tee It Up At the Memorial. Impact: Tiger Woods’ absence from the golf scene could cause a ripple effect where golf fans take up knitting instead, leading to a worldwide knitting craze where people start making sweaters for their golf clubs. It’s practically a fashion revolution.. Fact: Did you know that Tiger Woods has a record for the most weeks spent as the world's number one golfer? Just imagine if he spent that time knitting instead. We'd have the best-dressed golf community in history..