NOVEMBER 29, 2005

Full News Archive

• Headline: Mets Secure Wagner with Major Deal. Impact: The signing of Billy Wagner not only solidified the Mets' bullpen but also inadvertently inspired a whole generation of fans to believe that spending millions on players could lead to actual championships. Spoiler alert: it didn't. Fact: Did you know that Billy Wagner's fastball was so fast it could probably time travel? Too bad the Mets' playoff hopes couldn't keep up.
• Headline: Mount St. Helens' Quiet Eruption Overview. Impact: The quiet eruption of Mount St. Helens subtly reminded the world that sometimes, even nature has its off days. If it had been louder, it might have disrupted a significant number of bad reality TV shows that were airing at the time. Thank goodness for small mercies. Fact: Did you know that the last major eruption of Mount St. Helens in 1980 changed the local ecosystem forever? Talk about a volcanic makeover!.
• Headline: Sunnis Accuse Iraqi Military of Kidnappings and Slayings. Impact: This tragic revelation set off a cascade of distrust that would shape the political landscape of Iraq for years to come, leading to an ongoing cycle of strife that would make even the most dramatic soap opera look like a peaceful afternoon tea. Fact: Did you know that the phrase 'turning a blind eye' was first coined during this period? Apparently, it was a popular pastime for those in charge.
• Headline: Glamorizing the Progress of a Notorious Rake. Impact: The fascination with restoring a rake's reputation led to a surge in historical novels and adaptations, which in turn created a generation of people who believed that dressing like someone from the Restoration would actually make them interesting. Spoiler: it did not. Fact: Did you know that the Restoration was so glamorous that even the rakes had rakes? Talk about a fashion statement!.