SEPTEMBER 8, 2005

Full News Archive

• Headline: Egypt's Controversial Vote for Mubarak. Impact: The calm streets of Egypt led to a nationwide nap, allowing citizens to dream of a day when democracy might actually mean something, which in turn inspired a whole generation of young people to go into napping as a career path.. Fact: In case you were wondering, the only multiple-choice question anyone really wanted answered was 'How do we get rid of Mubarak?' Spoiler: It's a long story..
• Headline: Final Game of the Last Expos. Impact: The Expos' final game led to a massive increase in the popularity of the phrase 'What’s in a name?', inspiring future teams to consider names like the 'Losers' or 'The Almost Champions'.. Fact: Brad Wilkerson was so dedicated to his team that he wore the uniform even after the team was gone. Talk about loyalty; he could've taught a masterclass on denial!.
• Headline: Brooklyn Party Leader's Corruption Trial. Impact: The trial of the Brooklyn Party Leader caused a ripple effect where future politicians began to wonder if they should just skip the corruption altogether and go straight to the pizza parties.. Fact: In Brooklyn, political corruption trials are just another excuse to order takeout. Who doesn't love a good trial with a side of pizza?.
• Headline: Seeking Justice, of Gods or the Politicians. Impact: As discussions of theodicy post-Katrina unfolded, they inadvertently led to the creation of a new genre of literature: 'Natural Disaster Self-Help', where readers were encouraged to find the silver lining in floods.. Fact: Theodicy: Because sometimes you just have to ask if the universe has a sense of humor while your house is underwater. Spoiler: It probably doesn’t..