NOVEMBER 19, 2004

Full News Archive

• Headline: Cap Gemini Considers Selling North American Unit. Impact: The sale of Cap Gemini's American unit in the early 2000s led to a chain reaction in the outsourcing industry. This paved the way for a surge in tech startups, each claiming they could do consulting better, while actually just creating more colorful PowerPoint slides. Who knew that buying a consulting firm could lead to an explosion of mediocre advice?. Fact: Did you know that many consulting firms spend more time consulting themselves on how to look busy than actually solving problems? It's like inception, but for PowerPoint presentations..
• Headline: New York City's Art Revival Explored. Impact: The rise of public art in NYC in the early 2000s triggered an unexpected trend where hipsters began to think that spray painting their ex's name on a wall was 'art.' This led to a renaissance of poorly thought-out tattoos and a million Instagram posts featuring the hashtag #ArtIsSubjective.. Fact: Fun fact: The requirement to spend 1% of construction budgets on art means that at least 1% of New York's public spaces are now home to questionable sculptures that look like they were made during a particularly intense art class..
• Headline: Workers Unite Against Off-the-Clock Exploitation. Impact: The movement against unpaid labor in the early 2000s sparked a global uprising that eventually led to an age of workers proudly declaring their lunch breaks on social media. This subtly shifted workplace culture to one where everyone pretends to be productive while actually binging Netflix in the break room.. Fact: Believe it or not, many employers still think that making employees work off the clock is 'motivational.' It's like saying that a flat tire is a great way to get people to walk more..
• Headline: Former Viacom Chief Named to Lead Sirius. Impact: Mel Karmazin's leadership at Sirius marked the beginning of the battle for audio supremacy, leading to a world where people now have 300 podcast options about knitting and existential dread. Who knew that satellite radio would indirectly inspire a million discussions about the best way to brew coffee?. Fact: Did you know that Sirius Satellite Radio was once considered the 'future of radio'? Now, it's just another option for people who can't decide between 17 different stations of slow jams and true crime podcasts..
• Headline: A Freedom That Rings Too Often. Impact: The ringing cellphones during the preview of 'Democracy' inadvertently set a precedent for the next decade of theater-goers ignoring etiquette, resulting in a world where live performances became more about dodging incessant screens than enjoying the art. Bravo, humanity!. Fact: Fun fact: The average person checks their phone 96 times a day, which is almost as often as they pretend to listen to their friends. So, if your phone rings during a play, just blame it on 'artistic expression.'.