MARCH 11, 2004

Full News Archive

• Headline: Senator McCain's Steroid Warning to Baseball. Impact: If baseball had taken steroid regulations seriously, we might have a much different Hall of Fame today—one filled with players who didn’t look like they just walked out of a weightlifting competition. Also, fewer records broken by players who could bench press a small car.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more inflated than baseball players' egos during this time were their biceps? Just a fun little coincidence!.
• Headline: Big East Tournament Thrills Engaged Fans. Impact: This nail-biter of a game set the tone for future college basketball tournaments, where every single point counts and fans develop anxiety disorders based on a single missed free throw. Thanks, Notre Dame and Villanova, for the stress-induced heart palpitations!. Fact: Fun fact: The term 'March Madness' was originally used to describe the frantic last-minute decisions of college students trying to cram for finals!.
• Headline: A Culinary and Musical Delight. Impact: The review of 'Sweeney Todd' led to a surge in both opera attendance and meat pie consumption, ultimately resulting in a spike in dental visits. Who knew a musical about a barber-turned-murderer would have such delicious consequences?. Fact: Did you know 'Sweeney Todd' is often referred to as 'the musical that makes you reconsider your lunch choices'? Bon appétit!.
• Headline: INSIDE. Impact: The rise of Gerard Latortue as Haiti's prime minister may not have solved all of Haiti's problems, but it did inspire countless memes and political commentators to take a hard pass on discussing Caribbean politics with their friends.. Fact: Did you know that the political landscape in Haiti is so turbulent that even the weather feels the need to take cover? Talk about a stormy political climate!.
• Headline: Giving Neo-Classical a Little More Neo; An Architect Who Quietly Battles Trends Finds That He Nearly Is One. Impact: Thomas Gordon Smith's neo-Classical approach may have started a minor architectural revolution, leading to a bizarre trend where people began favoring columned porches and Roman-style baths in their suburban homes. Who needs modern design when you can live like an ancient Roman?. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more pretentious than a neo-Classical architect is a neo-Classical architect trying to explain why their designs are 'timeless.' Spoiler: They aren't..