JANUARY 24, 2004

Full News Archive

• Headline: Microsoft Antitrust Settlement Progress. Impact: Thanks to the judge's mild approval of Microsoft, countless hours of office workers around the globe were saved from rage-quitting due to software crashes. Instead, they just silently cursed under their breath while waiting for updates.. Fact: Did you know that Microsoft Word's 'Clippy' was actually a failed time-travel experiment? He was supposed to help, but instead just caused confusion through the ages..
• Headline: Jagr's Trade to the Rangers. Impact: Jaromir Jagr joining the Rangers triggered a series of trade deals that eventually led to the formation of super teams, where more stars gathered than in a Hollywood blockbuster. Spoiler: it didn't end well for anyone involved.. Fact: Did you know that Jagr is so good at hockey that he once single-handedly stopped a war by scoring a goal that made both sides reconsider their life choices? Okay, maybe not, but it sounds believable..
• Headline: A Wireless Deal Could Trouble Gear Makers. Impact: AT&T Wireless's decision to sell sparked a gaming frenzy among competitors, leading to a race for the latest tech that caused more stress than an unpaid intern at a tech startup. Spoiler alert: the equipment never got any lighter.. Fact: Did you know that 'wireless' used to mean 'you can use it in your living room, but good luck calling anyone from your bathroom'? Technology has really come a long way..
• Headline: Pakistan Chief Says It Appears Scientists Sold Nuclear Data. Impact: Musharraf's revelation about the shady dealings of scientists led to an international game of 'Who's the Spy?' that resulted in more paranoia than a conspiracy theorist's forum. Nuclear secrets? Just a casual Tuesday in geopolitics.. Fact: Did you know that selling nuclear data is still frowned upon? Who knew? Guess some people just missed that memo in the 'How to Be a Responsible Scientist' handbook..