JULY 5, 2003

Full News Archive

• Headline: Garamendi's Push for Insurance Reform. Impact: If Garamendi hadn't campaigned for insurance overhaul, we might all be paying our medical bills in goats and chickens by now. Who knew a third run for governor could save our wallets and livestock?. Fact: Did you know that the California insurance system is so complicated, even the math wizards at MIT would need a GPS to navigate it? Good luck, Garamendi!.
• Headline: Antique Cars Bring Joy to Seniors. Impact: By stirring memories of youth, these antique cars could have single-handedly reversed the aging process. Imagine a world where nursing home residents start racing down the street in classic T-Birds! Talk about a mid-life crisis on wheels.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing older than the people in that geriatric center is probably the T-Bird itself? Vintage cars and nostalgia really do have a way of keeping the spirit alive..
• Headline: About New York; Friendly Bank Makes It Easy For Robbers. Impact: If banks continue to be easy targets for robbers, we might soon see a rise in the 'Robbery Concierge' service. You know, where they help you plan your heist around the bank's lunch hours.. Fact: Did you know that robbing a bank is statistically more likely to happen than getting a decent cup of coffee in Manhattan? Now that's what I call a crime spree!.
• Headline: Sports of The Times; On a Key Shot, Roddick Missed It by This Much. Impact: Roddick's loss was so pivotal that it might have inspired a new generation of tennis players to miss their key shots, believing it's just part of the game. Thanks for the life lesson, Andy!. Fact: Did you know that Roddick's serve was so powerful that it was once mistaken for a UFO sighting? Who knew tennis could be so out of this world!.