Gadgets, lab surprises, odd bets, and future-shocks from this slice of the calendar.
The Sounds of
Popular recordings and roots/country selections associated with the year
HEADLINES ON March 12, 2003
Full News Archive
- Headline: ImClone Founder Settles Stock Trade Charges. Impact: Waksal's stock shenanigans opened the floodgates for a slew of new regulations, leading to the rise of compliance officers everywhere, forever sealing the fate of countless office workers who would now have to wear suits and pretend to care about paperwork.. Fact: Did you know that Samuel Waksal once tried to sell his grandma's stock tips? Turns out, the SEC wasn't impressed with those either..
- Headline: Ethics and Asbestos: Legal Settlement Insights. Impact: This legal settlement led to a domino effect of lawsuits in the asbestos industry, causing lawyers everywhere to suddenly feel like their careers had been blessed by a higher power. Who knew that a cauldron of ethics could brew such lucrative outcomes?. Fact: Did you know that asbestos was once marketed as a miracle material? Just goes to show, even the best ideas can have a toxic twist!.
- Headline: Rangers Obtain Oilers' Carter On Day of Trades. Impact: This trade was pivotal in changing the dynamics of both teams, leading to a series of poorly planned trades in the future that would haunt GMs for decades. Thanks, Anson Carter, for being the player that spurred a thousand regrets!. Fact: Did you know that the players involved in trades often throw tantrums that could rival a toddler's? If only they had a timeout chair in the locker room!.
- Headline: Nokia Warns on 1st-Quarter Earnings. Impact: Nokia's warning was a harbinger of doom for the mobile phone industry, leading to the rise of smartphones. Their failure to adapt is a classic case of 'what not to do' in the tech world, proving that even giants can stumble over their own shoelaces.. Fact: Did you know that Nokia was once the king of phones? Now, they're like that distant relative you avoid at family gatherings – you just hope they don’t show up!.
Wall Street Time Machine
AAPL
Apple
Apple - If you invested $1,000 in 2003, it would be worth $1,226,446 today (1226.4x return)