JANUARY 18, 2003

Full News Archive

• Headline: Raiders' Unique Player Regalia Explained. Impact: The Raiders' decision to sport leg plates instead of patches inadvertently sparked a new trend in the fashion world: protective sports gear as everyday attire. Fashionistas everywhere began strutting around in armored leggings, claiming it was haute couture.. Fact: Fun fact: The term 'leg plates' was almost replaced by 'style shields' until someone realized it sounded more like a medieval cooking tool than a sports accessory..
• Headline: Nets Win, but Challenging Trip Awaits. Impact: The Nets' win sparked a series of motivational speeches from coaches nationwide, leading to a bizarre decade where every sports team adopted a ‘we can do it too!’ mentality, resulting in the least qualified people attempting to run marathons.. Fact: Did you know that 'Nets Win' is actually the rallying cry for every underdog team secretly hoping to capitalize on the Nets' success? Spoiler: It rarely works..
• Headline: 3 QUITTING PANEL ON OLYMPIC ETHICS. Impact: The resignation of these Olympic committee members led to a sudden surge in people discovering the joy of DIY Olympic events at home, resulting in a spike in backyard javelin injuries and a national debate on the merits of inflatable pools.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more complicated than Olympic ethics is trying to explain to your grandma why you can’t just ‘play fair’ in a sport that’s all about winning?.