Gadgets, lab surprises, odd bets, and future-shocks from this slice of the calendar.
The Sounds of
Popular recordings and roots/country selections associated with the year
HEADLINES ON August 31, 2002
Full News Archive
- Headline: MLB Avoids Strike with Last-Minute Settlement. Impact: In an alternate timeline, had the baseball strike happened, all sports fans would have turned to interpretive dance as a new form of entertainment, leading to a worldwide dance-off in 2025 where no one could remember the rules, but everyone was wearing sequins.. Fact: Did you know that the last time baseball players struck, it led to the creation of a world where people took knitting more seriously? No, really, it was a dark time in sports history..
- Headline: Wrigley Field's Timeless Baseball Atmosphere. Impact: Had the Cubs fans turned sour that day, a massive wave of disillusionment would have swept through Chicago, leading to a surge in coffee shop poetry readings where all the poems were about the pain of lost baseball dreams.. Fact: Did you know that Wrigley Field is so iconic that it could probably run for mayor and win? At least it would get more votes than most politicians!.
- Headline: Historic Labor Deal in Baseball Talks. Impact: If the strike had occurred, the resulting chaos could have led to the emergence of a new sport called 'Extreme Couch Sitting,' which would have taken the world by storm in the early 2000s, leading to Olympic events and everything.. Fact: Did you know that in some parallel universe, the baseball players' union negotiated for a lifetime supply of hot dogs? Talk about a home run deal!.
- Headline: In Fight Over Women, Masters Gives Up Ads. Impact: By refusing to admit women, Augusta National Golf Club inadvertently sparked a movement that led to the creation of a secret society of female golfers who met in underground tunnels, plotting their takeover of the golfing world.. Fact: Did you know 'Hootie' Johnson is not just a name but a warning? It’s what happens when you think golf is more important than equality. Spoiler: it's not..
- Headline: Lesson Plans for Sept. 11 Offer a Study in Discord. Impact: This discord over lesson plans could have resulted in a nationwide scandal where teachers had to take a course on 'How to Not Offend Anyone' leading to the creation of the most boring curriculum imaginable that included no facts, just safe spaces.. Fact: Did you know that 'tolerance' used to be a word people could agree on? Now it’s like a political hot potato—everyone wants to toss it but no one wants to catch it..
Wall Street Time Machine
NFLX
Netflix
Netflix - If you invested $1,000 in 2002, it would be worth $785,671 today (785.7x return)
AAPL
Apple
Apple - If you invested $1,000 in 2002, it would be worth $779,032 today (779.0x return)