AUGUST 5, 2000

Full News Archive

• Headline: Gore's Strong Response at Fire Fighters Convention. Impact: This fiery comeback was the spark that ignited Al Gore's future career in climate activism. Had he not defended himself so passionately, he might have just faded into obscurity, leaving us without a champion for the climate. Instead, his speech led to the founding of countless eco-friendly coffee shops that serve ethically sourced lattes - because, you know, saving the planet needs a caffeine boost.. Fact: Did you know Al Gore once claimed he invented the internet? So, if he could create a global network, we can only imagine what he could do with a microphone and a crowd!.
• Headline: Barneys New York Post-Bankruptcy Insights. Impact: Barneys' struggle to regain its footing created a ripple effect that led to an explosion of thrift shopping and vintage clothing stores. If they had succeeded flawlessly, we might have never seen the rise of hipsters and their ironic mustaches. Thanks for the chaos, Barneys!. Fact: Fun fact: Barneys' bankruptcy made it a favorite plot point in countless TV shows. Because, you know, nothing says 'entertainment' like a struggling luxury retailer..
• Headline: Ecstasy Crisis Hits Brick Township Suburbs. Impact: The rise of Ecstasy in Brick Township kicked off a nationwide trend of suburban nightlife that led to the birth of countless questionable dance moves and even worse fashion choices. Had these kids not discovered rave culture, we might still be stuck in the '90s with only grunge to cling to.. Fact: Did you know the word 'Ecstasy' was originally a term for a divine or mystical experience? Seems fitting, considering the experiences that were had in Brick Township!.
• Headline: Attack Is Sharp but Defense Falters. Impact: The Packers' victory over the Jets led to an influx of cheesehead merchandise, thus solidifying Wisconsin's reputation as America's dairyland and giving rise to an entire economy based on foam hats. All thanks to one exhibition game. Who knew football could be so gouda?. Fact: Green Bay's fans are known as the Packers' '12th Man' - which is ironic, considering how many of them are actually just there for the tailgating!.