JULY 12, 2000

Full News Archive

• Headline: Historic Election of First Woman Bishop. Impact: The election of Rev. Vashti Murphy McKenzie as the first woman bishop led to a cascading wave of female leadership in various religious institutions, resulting in a future where 'man of the cloth' becomes an outdated term, as 'person of the cloth' reigns supreme. Who knew a little gender equity could throw such a wrench in the patriarchy?. Fact: Did you know that it took 213 years for the A.M.E. Church to elect a woman bishop? Talk about taking the scenic route to progress!.
• Headline: Footlights Community Day Celebration. Impact: This Community Day at the New York Theater Workshop marked the beginning of a trend where theater became the ultimate hipster pastime, leading to a world where everyone thinks they're a playwright, and coffee shops are filled with wannabe critics writing their 'masterpieces' on napkins.. Fact: In the spirit of community, did you know that attending a theater event is now 90% about social media posts and 10% about actually watching the performance?.
• Headline: Controversial Blood Donor Restrictions. Impact: Clyde Haberman's column sparked outrage that led to eventual reforms in blood donation policies, resulting in a future where the only qualifications for donating blood are a heartbeat and a pulse. Who would've thought that a column could save lives?. Fact: Did you know that the restrictions on blood donors were so archaic they could have been written by cavemen? 'If you touched another man, no soup for you!'.