FEBRUARY 8, 1999

Full News Archive

• Headline: Agency Resilience After Ovitz's Exit. Impact: If Michael Ovitz hadn't left, the CAA could have become the ultimate entertainment monopoly, leading to an alternate timeline where no one ever heard of independent filmmakers. Thanks, Ovitz!. Fact: Did you know that Ovitz's departure was so shocking, it resulted in the first industry-wide therapy group for agency heads? They meet weekly, sharing feelings and snacks..
• Headline: Welfare Funds Go Unused in Many States. Impact: The unused welfare money could have been a financial boon, but instead, it led to states inventing more creative ways to ignore poverty, like tax incentives for buying yachts.. Fact: Did you know that 'turning down free money' is now an official sport in some states? Gold medals are awarded based on financial negligence..
• Headline: Shift by Pataki In Budget Form Sets Off Anger In Legislature. Impact: Pataki's budget shift created a rift that fueled political drama, leading to a reality show about state government that was just as riveting as watching paint dry.. Fact: Did you know that George Pataki’s budget changes are considered the original inspiration for many reality TV shows? Who knew politicians could be so entertaining?.
• Headline: Another Movie Star Onstage; Uma Thurman Seeks a Challenge in 'The Misanthrope'. Impact: Uma Thurman's stage debut led to a theatrical renaissance that saw Hollywood stars flooding Broadway, ultimately resulting in a string of terrible movie adaptations of stage plays. Thanks, Uma!. Fact: Did you know that Molière's works have been adapted into more movies than most Oscar winners? Because who doesn’t want to see a 17th-century comedy with CGI?.
• Headline: Once Accused, Now the Accuser; Ex-Bomb Suspect's Suit Challenges an Atlanta Newsroom. Impact: Richard Jewell's lawsuit brought to light the media's role in public perception, leading to stricter laws on naming suspects, which ironically made every future case a guessing game.. Fact: Did you know that Richard Jewell's story later inspired a documentary about the dangers of premature accusations? It's called 'Oops, My Bad'..
• Headline: Rivals Jockey For 2d Place Behind 'Today'. Impact: The morning television jockeying led to a perpetual cycle of mediocre hosts and a national obsession with coffee-fueled banter that still plagues our mornings today. Thanks, morning TV!. Fact: Did you know that the phrase 'good morning' was officially trademarked by morning TV shows? You need a license to greet anyone before noon now..
• Headline: No Refuge From Terror For a Sphinx In Pinter Land. Impact: Pinter's play became a cultural touchstone that influenced generations of playwrights, leading to an increased appreciation for existential dread and awkward silences in both theater and daily life.. Fact: Did you know that watching Pinter plays is the only activity scientifically proven to increase your tolerance for awkward family gatherings?.
• Headline: How a Lunch Tidbit Led a Reporter to Write an Affidavit Rather Than a Story. Impact: The contradictions in Blumenthal's testimony opened the floodgates for media sensationalism, leading to the current era of 'news' that can basically be any interpretation of a sneeze.. Fact: Did you know that this incident inspired a new genre of journalism called 'fictitious fact-checking'? It has no rules and a lot of fun!.