JANUARY 14, 1999

Full News Archive

• Headline: Michael Graves Designs New Target Housewares. Impact: Michael Graves' trendy housewares for Target sparked a nationwide obsession with design, leading to the invention of the hipster aesthetic and an explosion of ironic mustaches in the 2000s.. Fact: Did you know that 'mall rats' are not actually a species? They’re just humans that have given up on any other form of social interaction?.
• Headline: U.S. Faces Economic Dilemmas Amidst Crisis. Impact: As the U.S. economy sank, the painful choices made during this period led to a series of questionable fashion trends in the 2000s as people tried to cope with their financial despair through ironic clothing.. Fact: Did you know that economic pain can also be felt by your closet? It’s the only pain that doesn’t come with a doctor’s bill..
• Headline: Removal of Healthy Breasts Is Found to Cut Cancer Risk. Impact: The discovery that removing healthy breasts could reduce cancer risk by 90% sparked a wave of preventative surgeries, leading to an unexpected boom in the custom bra industry.. Fact: Did you know that this study changed the conversation about women's health? Suddenly, 'healthy' became a whole new definition!.
• Headline: An Art Book For Browsing The Internet. Impact: Lois Swan Jones' book on art information online paved the way for the eventual explosion of clickbait articles about art, leading to a generation that thinks they understand Van Gogh because they saw a meme.. Fact: Did you know that 'browsing' the internet used to mean looking for information, and not just endlessly scrolling through cat videos?.
• Headline: TURMOIL IN BRAZIL: THE MISTAKES -- Economic Scene; Brazil Swallows Another Bitter Pill. Impact: Brazil's economic turmoil became a case study for future economies facing IMF intervention, eventually leading to a global trend of nations playing 'hot potato' with their budgets.. Fact: Did you know that devaluing currency is like taking off a band-aid? It hurts like hell, but it’s supposed to make you feel better later… or so they say..
• Headline: With Minimalist Approach, Paleontology Is Brought to Life. Impact: The minimalist approach to paleontology made dinosaurs seem less intimidating, leading to a generation of kids who thought they could be friends with T-Rex instead of fearing them.. Fact: Did you know that paleontologists are just glorified bone collectors? They could literally lead a treasure hunt and call it science!.
• Headline: Personal Shopper; No More Blue Mondays. Impact: The rise of personal shopping meant that soon everyone would have a personal stylist, leading to a decline in self-sufficiency and an increase in people who can’t even pick out their own socks.. Fact: Did you know that 'Blue Mondays' are now just an excuse for people to buy more clothes? Who knew sadness could be so fashionable?.
• Headline: Ex-Aide to Reagan Will Head the Congressional Budget Office. Impact: Dan L. Crippen stepping into the Congressional Budget Office meant that economic debates became slightly more bearable, leading to the eventual rise of memes making fun of politicians.. Fact: Did you know that the Congressional Budget Office is like the referee in a game of political dodgeball? They never get to play, but everyone blames them for the injuries..