SEPTEMBER 20, 1998

Full News Archive

• Headline: Mastering Copper Pipe Plumbing Techniques. Impact: If only plumbers had known that fixing copper pipes would lead to a renaissance in DIY home improvement shows and the rise of social media influencers, maybe they would have charged more.. Fact: Did you know that copper pipes are often considered a symbol of home ownership? Because nothing says 'I am an adult' like fixing plumbing instead of calling a professional!.
• Headline: Stephen Foster's Old Hoboken Home. Impact: The rediscovery of Foster's home sparked a real estate craze in Hoboken, leading to overpriced condos. Little did they know, gentrification would someday be the real 'Doo-Dah!'. Fact: Isn't it ironic that the man who wrote 'Oh! Susanna' is now associated with homes that cost more than a lifetime supply of banjos?.
• Headline: Nawaz Sharif's U.S. Visit After Controversy. Impact: Nawaz Sharif's U.S. visit inadvertently set off a chain reaction of diplomatic visits that ultimately led to the invention of the world's first passport photo selfie. Yes, we can thank politics for awkward family photos.. Fact: Political leaders leaving their country for the U.S. has been a thing for ages. Apparently the grass is always greener when you're looking for a nice photo op..
• Headline: Cornering the Market on Creeps and Nerds. Impact: Ben Stiller's rise to fame created a seismic shift in Hollywood, where now every aspiring actor believes they can be famous just by being awkward. Welcome to the age of the 'quirky'!. Fact: Fun fact: Hollywood once thought nerds were just for comic books. Now they’re the leading demographic for blockbuster films. Thanks, Stiller!.
• Headline: Proponent of an Ever-Potent Lodestone: Bad Taste. Impact: John Waters championed bad taste, which has since blossomed into a full-blown aesthetic movement. Remember, every hipster wearing a mustache owes their look to Waters' cinematic revolution.. Fact: They say bad taste is subjective, but if you don’t like John Waters, you might just be doing it wrong..
• Headline: Asbury Park's Stone Pony Rides Off Into the Sunset. Impact: The closure and transition of the Stone Pony marked the end of an era, but also initiated a trend where nightclubs transformed into places that serve overpriced cocktails. Because nothing says 'fun' like a $15 drink!. Fact: The Stone Pony was once a launching pad for Springsteen. Now it’s just a launching pad for people who want to forget their college days..
• Headline: LONG ISLAND GUIDE. Impact: This guide inadvertently led to the rise of 'Long Island' as a cultural reference point, making it impossible to visit without hearing about a celebrity’s home. Thanks for the pressure, Long Island!. Fact: Did you know that Long Island is home to more private beaches than public ones? Because who doesn’t want to pay for sand?.
• Headline: New Head at Katonah Art Museum. Impact: Susan H Edwards taking charge at the museum sent shockwaves through the art world, prompting intense discussions about what constitutes 'art'—leading to the rise of performance art that nobody understands.. Fact: Katonah Art Museum: where the art is so modern, even the artists need a manual to explain it..
• Headline: Never Mind the Starbucks. Please Pass the Carafe.. Impact: The shift from coffee to cocktails at home set off a wave of in-home barista competitions, leading to the rise of the 'professional home drinker'—a valid career choice for the next generation.. Fact: Isn’t it funny that the trend of drinking more at home means we can now blame our bad decisions on 'home improvement'?.
• Headline: The Nation: Shadow Play -- Washington's Gears, Grinding; Surprise: Government's Not Necessarily Paralyzed. Impact: This headline was a subtle reminder that U.S. politics is like a machine that may stall but never truly shuts down—just like your old car that somehow keeps going despite the smoke.. Fact: The phrase 'government is not necessarily paralyzed' could probably be the slogan for every administration since the dawn of time..