JUNE 24, 1998

Full News Archive

• Headline: Relaxed Arbitration Rules for Brokers. Impact: This rule change led to a dramatic increase in brokers filing lawsuits outside of the arbitration panels. It’s rumored that one disgruntled broker’s complaint about missing lunch breaks eventually led to the creation of the 'World's Most Complicated Sandwich' - which is now an annual competition.. Fact: Did you know that relaxing arbitration rules is basically corporate karaoke? Everyone's singing their own tune, and the audience (aka the courts) is just there for the free popcorn..
• Headline: Capital Gains Tax Rate Reduction Proposal. Impact: By cutting the holding period for capital gains, Congress inadvertently paved the way for a generation obsessed with flipping houses and stocks like they were Pokémon cards. Who knew that a tax break could lead to a nationwide obsession with reality TV?. Fact: Nothing says 'I love the economy' quite like a bunch of politicians slashing taxes while trying to convince us they’re not just looking out for their rich buddies..
• Headline: AT&T's Major Cable Acquisition Deal. Impact: AT&T’s acquisition of TCI sparked a wave of cable mergers that ultimately led to the invention of the term 'binge-watching.' If they hadn’t bought TCI, we might all still be watching TV one episode at a time – how tragic!. Fact: AT&T’s motto at the time was 'Reach out and touch someone,' which is ironic considering how many people they disconnected to create their cable empire..
• Headline: Chinese Agog at Clinton, a Hero (Like Nixon). Impact: Clinton's newfound hero status in China led to a series of 'Clinton for President' merchandise sales that made more money than any campaign. Who knew a political tour could also double as a fashion trend?. Fact: Funny how a president can go from 'who is this guy?' to 'let's put his face on everything!' in just a few months. Talk about a glow-up..
• Headline: House Bill Protects Internet From New Taxes. Impact: This bill's approval kept the internet tax-free for a while, allowing online shopping to explode. This led to the birth of 'Amazon Prime Day' – a day when people buy things they don’t need just because it’s on sale. Thanks, Congress!. Fact: You know things are serious when the government has to step in to protect your online shopping. Next, they'll be saving us from impulse buys at 2 AM..
• Headline: There's Still No Vanilla In a Finley Encounter. Impact: Finley's show, while controversial, sparked a movement for more avant-garde performances. This eventually led to the world embracing bizarre art forms – we now have performance art involving pickles and interpretive dance. You're welcome, future generations.. Fact: Karen Finley’s chocolate-covered performances were so memorable that they inspired a whole generation of artists to rethink their snack choices during shows..
• Headline: City Lacks Laws to Curb Illegal Manufacturing, Official Says. Impact: The explosion and fire incident opened the floodgates for city regulations, leading to stricter building codes. Ironically, this meant that the illegal furniture shops had to get more creative – and we now have artisanal illegal furniture.. Fact: The only thing worse than an illegal furniture shop is an illegal furniture shop that also serves organic coffee. Now that’s a real crime against humanity..
• Headline: France Or U.S.? Now It's A Hard Choice. Impact: The fusion of cuisines and rise of cooking schools led to a global culinary culture where foodies now argue over which is better: French or American fusion. Spoiler alert: they both involve way too many ingredients.. Fact: If you think cooking schools are just about food, think again. They’re really just places for people to argue about who can use the most truffle oil in a dish..
• Headline: Political Memo; The Mussolini Of Manhattan? Giuliani Grins And Bears It. Impact: Giuliani’s likening to Mussolini set a precedent for future politicians being compared to historical figures, leading to a surge in political caricatures and satire. Now, every time someone does something unpopular, they get a historical nickname – thanks, Rudy!. Fact: Being called the 'Mussolini of Manhattan' is a new low, but don't worry, there’s always a worse title waiting around the corner in politics..