JUNE 12, 1998

Full News Archive

• Headline: Asia Economies Deteriorate Amid Yen Decline. Impact: The drop of the yen triggered a chain reaction that led to the rise of the internet meme 'Yen Droppin' like it's hot', which ultimately influenced the creation of countless YouTube channels dedicated to financial advice from cats.. Fact: In 1998, the economies were so gloomy that even the sun was considering taking a vacation to a more cheerful place..
• Headline: Stranded Island Encounter: A Unique Story. Impact: The magazine editor and cargo pilot’s unexpected island adventure prompted the creation of an entire genre of reality TV shows centered around stranded individuals who somehow manage to find love while surviving on coconuts and questionable decisions.. Fact: Stranded on a beautiful island? Bet they thought they were in a romance novel until they realized the WiFi was down..
• Headline: House Passes Bill to Crack Down on Pedophiles Exploiting Internet. Impact: The passing of this bill led to a massive increase in online cat videos, as the internet became a safer place for children and cats were deemed the perfect distraction from the horrors of reality.. Fact: Who knew that a bill could lead to the establishment of 'Cat Video Day'? The internet is wild like that!.
• Headline: Romance and Grit on a Wartime English Farm. Impact: As three urban women farmed during the war, their story inspired a generation of hipsters to start 'farm-to-table' restaurants, which ironically meant they had to import their ingredients from the same urban areas they fled.. Fact: Because nothing says 'I love nature' quite like a fresh salad flown in from 3,000 miles away..
• Headline: New Proposal Would Alter Stock Sales to Employees. Impact: This proposal inadvertently led to the rise of corporate espionage where employees started trading secret stock tips under the table, resulting in an entire subculture of 'stock whisperers' emerging.. Fact: They say money can't buy happiness, but it can surely buy you a good stock tip... if you know the right people..
• Headline: Jaded Artist and Ingenue In an Arty Spider Web. Impact: The jaded artist's story sparked a wave of 'burnout' art exhibitions worldwide, leading to a renaissance of grumpy artists expressing their dissatisfaction with life through questionable fashion choices.. Fact: In the art world, being jaded is basically the equivalent of having a Ph.D. in existential dread..
• Headline: Serbs Using Land Mines in Effort To Seal Kosovo-Albania Border. Impact: The use of land mines led to a significant rise in anti-war protests, which eventually inspired a punk rock movement dedicated to singing about the dangers of garden equipment and the hazards of war.. Fact: Land mines: the original party poopers of military strategy. Who needs a dance floor when you have a minefield?.
• Headline: Licensing of Names Adds to Image and Profit. Impact: The boom in corporate brand licensing led to the bizarre trend of licensing everything from toilet paper to pet rocks, making millions, proving that absolutely nothing is sacred when it comes to profit.. Fact: In the world of branding, if it exists, it can and will be licensed. Coming soon: the 'corporate brand' scent for your morning coffee!.
• Headline: Man in the News; Flinty Chief Executive Whom Long Islanders Love to Hate -- William James Catacosinos. Impact: William Catacosinos' controversial compensation sparked a national debate on executive pay, leading to the creation of the 'What the Cataclysm?' award for the most outrageous executive salaries in history.. Fact: William Catacosinos: proving that loving to hate someone can also come with a hefty price tag... for everyone else..