MAY 18, 1998

Full News Archive

• Headline: Texans Battle Smoke from Mexican Fires. Impact: The smoke from Mexico's fires led Texans to invest in air purifiers, which eventually sparked a boom in the clean air tech industry. This inadvertently caused a rise in hipster 'clean air cafes' that served nothing but oxygen.. Fact: Texans are so dedicated to their health that they consider 'smog' a new flavor of BBQ sauce..
• Headline: Exploring Peter Falk's Artistic Journey. Impact: Peter Falk’s existential journey in this play inspired a generation of philosophers who took to wearing trench coats and mumbling about the meaning of life, leading to an unexpected rise in sales of tobacco.. Fact: Peter Falk once played a detective who solved crimes by asking the right questions; unlike many politicians, he actually got answers..
• Headline: Fear's Persistence in Washington Heights. Impact: The lingering fear in Washington Heights led to a surge in home security sales, which ironically resulted in an increase in neighborhood trust, as residents banded together to patrol their own streets.. Fact: Fear may linger, but so do nosy neighbors. They make the best unofficial crime deterrents..
• Headline: Sports of The Times; Point Loma Yankees Are a Couple of Perfectionists. Impact: The perfectionism of two Yankee pitchers inspired a new trend of overachieving in sports, leading to a nationwide phenomenon where kids started practicing their swings more than their homework.. Fact: Point Loma High School now offers a major in 'Perfectionism'—because why not strive for a 101%?.
• Headline: Report Says New York Cuts Environmental Enforcement. Impact: New York's environmental enforcement cuts led to a trend where people began to paint their garbage cans green, thinking it would help the environment. Spoiler: it did not.. Fact: In New York, 'environmental enforcement' is often just a euphemism for 'let's see how many potholes we can ignore.'.
• Headline: Magazines Bowing to Demands for Star Treatment. Impact: The rise of celebrity control over media led to a bizarre era where magazines began publishing more cover stories about cats than actual celebrities, resulting in a cultural shift towards feline supremacy.. Fact: If you think celebrities are hard to please, just wait until you meet their cats..
• Headline: Long Before Microsoft's Internet War: A Peaceful Ethernet. Impact: Metcalfe's Ethernet invention paved the way for the internet, which led to the creation of memes, cat videos, and the eventual downfall of meaningful discourse on social media.. Fact: Ethernet started as a way to connect computers, but it quickly became a way to connect people to cat videos instead..
• Headline: I.R.S. Says Tax Refunds Are Up by 7.1%. Impact: The increase in tax refunds led to a nationwide 'treat yourself' movement, where people splurged on unnecessary items, sparking the rise of thrift stores filled with barely used impulse buys.. Fact: As it turns out, the IRS isn't just a tax collector; they are also the unintentional sponsors of impulse shopping sprees..
• Headline: Antitrust Talks Founder On Microsoft's 'Desktop'. Impact: The antitrust suit against Microsoft led to a frenzy of start-ups trying to create the next big thing, resulting in a tech bubble that eventually burst, leading to the phrase 'too many apps, not enough time.'. Fact: Microsoft's monopoly was so strong that even Monopoly® wanted to distance itself from the association..