MAY 9, 1998

Full News Archive

• Headline: Yankees Triumph Over Twins, 5-1. Impact: Little did Knoblauch know, his ability to brush off boos would inspire future athletes to develop a robust career in ignoring social media hate. Fast forward a few decades, and we have influencers thriving on their ability to dodge negativity like it’s the plague.. Fact: Did you know that the Yankees' defeat of the Twins had nothing to do with skill and everything to do with the sheer volume of hot dogs consumed at the game?.
• Headline: G.O.P. Seeks Conservative Support Ahead of Elections. Impact: This moment marked the beginning of the Great Republican Panic, a phenomenon where members of the party continue to court conservatives like they are the last slice of pizza at a party—everyone desperately wants a piece, but no one wants to be the one to take it.. Fact: Did you know that the 'G.O.P.' stands for 'Greatly Overwhelmed Politicians' during election season?.
• Headline: Border War As a Ploy: Companies Seldom Lose. Impact: The companies' tactics inspired future generations to realize that when it comes to business, fearmongering is a tried-and-true method. Congratulations, you’ve just unlocked the secret to corporate success: scare tactics!. Fact: Did you know that New Jersey and New York's rivalry is so intense, they once considered building a wall—just to keep the bagels on their respective sides?.
• Headline: Democratic Candidates for Governor Struggle to Stir Interest. Impact: This struggle to capture public interest foreshadowed a future where social media would become the primary platform for political engagement. Spoiler alert: it didn’t help much.. Fact: Did you know that stirring interest in politics is about as successful as trying to get a cat to take a bath?.
• Headline: Charles Meares, 91, Who Led Big Insurer. Impact: Meares’ leadership paved the way for future insurance moguls, who would go on to master the art of making money off the uncertainties of life. His legacy lives on in every insurance policy that makes you question if you really need coverage for alien abduction.. Fact: Did you know that insurance is the only industry where you pay for a product you hope you never have to use?.
• Headline: U.S. JOBLESS RATE PLUNGES TO 4.3%, LOWEST SINCE 1970. Impact: The drop in joblessness set off a hiring frenzy that would eventually lead to the creation of a million new LinkedIn profiles and more awkward small talk at networking events than humanity could handle.. Fact: Did you know that the job market has a tendency to rise and fall faster than a roller coaster, but with significantly less fun?.
• Headline: Charles (Bebe) Rebozo, 85; Longtime Nixon Confidant. Impact: Rebozo’s death signified the end of an era for Nixon's inner circle, leading to a series of conspiracy theories about how he was the last person who knew where all the skeletons were buried—literally and figuratively.. Fact: Did you know that being a confidant to a president is just an official title for 'the person who knows too much'?.
• Headline: Coda for a Homeless Dancer; After Years in the Shadows, a Sudden Burst of Fame. Impact: Arthur Bell's story reminds us that sometimes, the most talented individuals are the ones we least expect, leading to a cultural shift where everyone suddenly claims they 'discovered' the next big star in their local coffee shop.. Fact: Did you know that the ballet world has a habit of ignoring talent until it becomes trendy? It’s like waiting for avocado toast to become a thing before admitting you liked it first..
• Headline: Tobacco Companies Settle a Suit With Minnesota for $6.5 Billion. Impact: The settlement marked a pivotal moment in the tobacco industry, leading to future lawsuits that would make lawyers wealthier than the CEOs of the companies they were suing. Who knew that being addicted could also mean being financially lucrative?. Fact: Did you know that tobacco companies have more money than sense, and that’s saying a lot for a business that sells products known to kill people?.