MARCH 2, 1998

Full News Archive

• Headline: Exploring Civility in Urban Governance. Impact: Giuliani's obsession with civility led to a wave of overly polite New Yorkers who now apologize to pigeons when they bump into them. The city's pigeons have since formed a union.. Fact: Giuliani quoting Plato is like a cat trying to explain quantum physics – it's amusing, but we're all just here for the chaos..
• Headline: Garment Center: Rents, Struggles, and Changes. Impact: Soaring rents in the Garment District prompted the rise of a new fashion trend: 'Homeless Chic', where the latest runway looks simply involve wearing what you can find in a dumpster.. Fact: Did you know the Garment District used to be the backbone of NYC’s fashion scene? Now it’s more like the spine after a yoga class – all bent out of shape..
• Headline: Independent Lawyer Relishes Another Shot at Independent Counsel. Impact: Mandanici's battle against Starr inspired a series of courtroom dramas where lawyers become the new superheroes, complete with capes made from outdated legal briefs.. Fact: They say justice is blind, but in this case, it seems to have misplaced its glasses and is stumbling into all the wrong cases..
• Headline: HOCKEY: Hockey's Improvising Gold Glove; Hasek Has Redefined The Way to Play Goalie, But Don't Tell Him That. Impact: Hasek's revolutionary goalie style inspired a new generation of goalies who think that flopping around like a fish is an actual strategy. The fish market is thriving.. Fact: Did you know that Hasek's style is so unique that he's been invited to join Cirque du Soleil? They thought he'd bring some much-needed 'wow' factor..
• Headline: Reporter's Notebook; Southern Republicans Pick Gov. Bush in Straw Poll. Impact: Bush winning the straw poll was the butterfly that flapped its wings and somehow led to a decade of questionable decisions, confusing headlines, and a reality show presidency.. Fact: Fun fact: winning a straw poll is like winning a participation trophy in the Olympics of politics – congratulations, you showed up!.
• Headline: Sometimes the Eye of the Beholder Sees Too Clearly for Its Own Good. Impact: Brantley reviewing 'Art' led to a renaissance of people pretending to understand modern art, resulting in the rise of hipster coffee shops with abstract paintings on the walls.. Fact: Did you know that 'Art' is just a fancy way of saying 'I could do that, but I didn’t'? Welcome to the modern art world, where everyone is a critic..
• Headline: Spyglass, a Pioneer, Learns Hard Lessons About Microsoft. Impact: Spyglass's struggles with Microsoft led to the creation of a secret society of underdog tech companies who meet annually to share war stories and plot world domination.. Fact: Microsoft's competition tactics are so intense that they make high school drama look like a tea party. Welcome to the corporate jungle!.
• Headline: Ramchandran Jaikumar, 53, Business Professor at Harvard. Impact: Jaikumar's untimely passing sent ripples through academia, reminding professors everywhere to tone down the stress levels or risk becoming a cautionary tale.. Fact: The irony of a business professor dying of a heart attack isn't lost on anyone – it's like a chef getting food poisoning. Sometimes life just likes to throw curveballs..