FEBRUARY 11, 1994

Full News Archive

• Headline: Sultry Outlaws: A Cinematic Journey. Impact: This sultry remake sparked a cultural obsession with outlaws, leading to a generation of people thinking wearing leather jackets and riding motorcycles was a suitable substitute for therapy. Thanks, Hollywood!. Fact: Did you know that 'sultry pair' has been used to describe many things, including my last two attempts at a relationship? You can't make this stuff up!.
• Headline: Attractive Subsidized Housing Initiatives. Impact: The realization that subsidized housing could be attractive led to the great suburban 'I can't believe it's not a McMansion' movement, where every neighborhood suddenly had a gaggle of faux-stone façades and overpriced popcorn ceilings.. Fact: Fun fact: 'Attractive to boot' is a common phrase used by real estate agents when they want to distract you from the fact that the house is literally sinking into the ground..
• Headline: Bizarre Film: Dark Family Secrets Revealed. Impact: This film's portrayal of family dynamics led to a rise in psychoanalysis, with therapists everywhere now having to deal with clients who think they are the next great American auteur, all while hiding their own family secrets.. Fact: Fun fact: Burying your mother in cement is not actually a recommended familial bonding activity, despite what this film might suggest. Just a little heads up!.
• Headline: Review/Film; A Mystery of Adolescence, Circa 1974. Impact: This nostalgic film about adolescence caused a spike in teenage angst, leading to a world filled with moody teenagers who all believed they could write the next great American novel while wearing oversized flannel shirts.. Fact: Did you know that palm trees are often used as a backdrop in films to symbolize 'chasing dreams'? Because nothing says 'I want to make it in life' quite like palm trees and an existential crisis..