DECEMBER 24, 1993

Full News Archive

• Headline: Neighbors Feud Over Widow Drama. Impact: If neighbors had just learned to share their cookies instead of feuding over a widow, we might have avoided the entire concept of reality TV. Imagine a world where The Real Housewives of Anywhere didn’t exist. A true utopia!. Fact: Did you know that feuding neighbors are often the inspiration for countless sitcoms? Apparently, we find other people's drama way more entertaining than our own..
• Headline: Heaven and Earth: A Woman's Perspective. Impact: This film's portrayal of Vietnam from a woman's perspective might have sparked a global revolution in storytelling. If only the world had listened, we could have avoided countless 'bro-centric' war movies. But hey, who doesn't love more explosions?. Fact: Fun fact: Hollywood still struggles with the concept of a woman’s view in war films. They must think women are too busy knitting to notice the horrors of conflict. Spoiler: they aren’t..
• Headline: Moscow's Changing Refugee Policies. Impact: Moscow’s withdrawal from welcoming refugees might have been the first domino in a long line of international relations disasters. Next thing you know, everyone’s building walls instead of bridges. Who knew one withdrawal could lead to such a mess?. Fact: Did you know that the term 'refugee' comes from the Latin 'refugium', meaning 'to flee'? So, it’s pretty much a fancy way of saying, 'Yeah, I’m outta here!'.
• Headline: A Fractious Old West in a Modern Moral Universe. Impact: If only Earp and Holliday had resolved their issues with a group therapy session instead of shootouts, we could have rewritten the entire Wild West narrative. They might have even formed the first cowboy support group. A true tragedy!. Fact: Did you know that Doc Holliday was actually a dentist? So, technically, he was the original 'Dr. Feelgood' of the Wild West, just with a lot more gunpowder and a lot less floss..
• Headline: Housing for the Elderly; Connecticut Project Offers a Range of Residences. Impact: If this Connecticut project had set a trend earlier, we might have seen the rise of village-style developments for all ages, where grumpy seniors and rebellious toddlers could co-exist in harmony. A true dream of chaos!. Fact: Did you know that the average age of a retiree is now older than the average age of a reality TV star? Talk about a plot twist in the aging narrative!.