JULY 2, 1993

Full News Archive

• Headline: The Way To Her Heart: Through Her Hair. Impact: This film's catastrophic reception led to a sudden rise in the production of romantic comedies featuring animals as main characters. Who knew an unfunny boyfriend could result in a talking dog saving the day? Thanks, bad cinema!. Fact: Did you know that the term 'goofy boyfriend' was actually coined after this film? It has since been used to describe over 90% of rom-com male leads!.
• Headline: Harvard Fours Triumph at Henley Regatta. Impact: The record-breaking race inspired a secret society of rowers who believed they could harness the power of the Thames to create a time machine. Spoiler: they just ended up with a lot of soggy uniforms and a fervent dislike for oars.. Fact: Did you know that rowing is the only sport where you can have a team of four and still lose to a single duck? Just ask Harvard!.
• Headline: Preserved Land and Real Estate Development. Impact: This real estate development sparked a movement for eco-friendly living, leading to the creation of tiny homes and an unending series of Instagram posts featuring people who just can't stop posing in front of their non-existent backyards.. Fact: Fun fact: 'big lots' are actually just what happens when a suburbanite realizes they can't afford a mansion but still want to brag about owning land. Welcome to modern capitalism!.