DECEMBER 4, 1992

Full News Archive

• Headline: Mr. Murphy Goes to Washington Review. Impact: If Mr. Murphy had chosen a different destination—say, a bakery instead of Washington—who knows? The nation's pie consumption could have skyrocketed, leading to an obesity epidemic and a national crisis over dessert etiquette!. Fact: Mr. Murphy's adventures inspired countless politicians to think they could just 'wing it' too, leading to a surge in political careers based on charisma alone—because who needs qualifications, right?.
• Headline: Affordable Two-Family Housing Initiative. Impact: The affordable housing initiative sparked a revolution in urban development, inadvertently causing a boom in hipster coffee shops that serve overpriced lattes in repurposed two-family homes—because nothing says 'community' like a $6 cup of coffee.. Fact: It's ironic that these homes are built on vacant lots—because nothing screams 'urban renewal' like turning a neglected space into something that still has a 50% chance of being called 'gentrification'!.