JUNE 1, 1992

Full News Archive

• Headline: Trump Tower Adjusts to 1990s Market. Impact: If Trump Tower had just stuck to its 80's glitz, perhaps the world would be a different place, with fewer orange-tinted hairdos in politics and more sensible real estate practices. Imagine a timeline where 'The Apprentice' was just a quaint reality show about actual apprenticeships!. Fact: Did you know that if you stack all the 'scaled-back' expectations from Trump Tower, you'd have enough to build another mediocre skyscraper? They might call it 'Expectation Tower'..
• Headline: NEC and Micron Collaborate on Memory Chips. Impact: This partnership might have led to a world where we all had computer memory chips embedded in our brains by the early 2000s, resulting in a dystopia where no one can forget their ex's annoying habits. Thanks, NEC and Micron, for saving us from that nightmare!. Fact: Fun fact: NEC stands for 'Never-ending Collaboration'. Just kidding! But it should, considering how many pacts they've made over the years. It's like they can't decide who gets to sell the chips!.