DECEMBER 1, 1990

Full News Archive

• Headline: Navigating Pop Culture in Turbulent Times. Impact: If only the Twentysomethings had known that their indifference to pop culture would lead to the rise of TikTok influencers, they might have rallied for change. But instead, here we are, stuck in a world where dance challenges rule the day.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more confusing than the pop landscape of the '60s is trying to explain it to someone born after 2000? Good luck!.
• Headline: H.U.D. Addresses Housing Authority Concerns. Impact: The H.U.D. report sparked a wave of skepticism that would eventually lead to countless conspiracy theories about government reports being nothing but 'alternative facts.' Those poor township residents never knew they were part of a larger narrative.. Fact: Did you know that scoffing is considered a legitimate form of protest in some communities? Just kidding, it isn't... but it should be!.
• Headline: Maidenhair Fern Conservation Efforts. Impact: The battle for Maidenhair Ferns was just the beginning. If they hadn’t rallied, we might have lost all ferns to the ruthless tyranny of plastic plants, leading to an alternate universe where ferns are extinct and everyone decorates with faux greenery.. Fact: Fun fact: Ferns are the hipster of plants—always endangered and loved by environmentalists before it was cool..
• Headline: Kennedy Smoke Upsets Neighbor. Impact: The smoke from Kennedy Airport acted as a warning sign for future generations: if you see smoke, it’s probably not from a barbecue. The ensuing panic over air quality led to the invention of scented candles, which ironically solved nothing.. Fact: Did you know that black smoke has been scientifically proven to not be as comforting as a cozy fireplace? Shocking, I know..
• Headline: Theater; The Board Is Talking Center Stage. Impact: The Manhattan Theater Club’s breakfast meeting set off a chain reaction of artistic pretentiousness. As Lynne Meadow was late, countless playwrights were inspired to write tragic plays about the trauma of waiting for breakfast.. Fact: Did you know that the most thrilling theater experience is waiting for someone to show up? You're welcome!.
• Headline: FORUM; The Saudis' Gulf-Crisis Windfall. Impact: The Gulf-Crisis windfall introduced the world to the concept of 'making money off misery,' which has since evolved into every aspect of modern capitalism. Thanks, oil barons, for paving the way for every overpriced avocado toast.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more volatile than oil prices is the average person's opinion on climate change? Enjoy the debate!.
• Headline: Guild Hall to Salute Area Artists. Impact: Paul Davis receiving a Lifetime Achievement Award led to others thinking they, too, could receive accolades for simply existing. This sparked a movement where participation trophies became a cultural norm, leading to the rise of the 'everyone's a winner' mentality.. Fact: Did you know that being part of a 'who's who' list doesn't guarantee you won't end up in a 'who's that?' conversation at parties? Awkward!.
• Headline: School Serves the Public in a Private Way. Impact: The private way of serving the public reminded everyone that schools can be as mysterious as a magician's trick. This led to parents questioning what exactly their kids were learning, ultimately causing a rise in trivia games at family gatherings.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing scarier than a high school play is the thought of performing in one? Break a leg, but not literally!.
• Headline: Businesses Give Funds For Scientific Education. Impact: Bertram Siegel’s mysterious science demonstrations inspired a generation of kids to believe that science was just a series of magic tricks. This belief eventually led to the creation of ‘YouTube Science Wizards,’ who are neither wizards nor scientists.. Fact: Did you know that cherry-flavored science experiments are a great way to ruin a perfectly good laboratory? Bon appétit!.