JULY 21, 1990

Full News Archive

• Headline: Brando's Witty Take on College Life. Impact: If Marlon Brando had never embraced his 'godfather' persona, the entire mafia movie genre might have taken a hard left turn into musicals. Imagine 'West Side Story' with actual mobsters? Yikes!. Fact: Brando once claimed he could have played any role, including the lead in 'The Sound of Music.' I mean, who wouldn’t want to see him serenade a bunch of singing children?.
• Headline: New Condos Honor Glendale's Historic Charm. Impact: The construction of condos in Glendale sparked a real estate frenzy that led to the rise of hipster coffee shops everywhere, thus making it impossible to find a decent cup of coffee without a side of avocado toast.. Fact: These condos were designed to evoke the past, which is funny because the only thing they're really evoking is a skyrocketing rent..
• Headline: 1950's Cool Meets 1980's Tensions. Impact: This film's unique blend of 1950's cool and 80's angst likely inspired countless bad fashion choices and even worse haircuts, leading to a collective cringe that would echo through the decades.. Fact: You know you're in trouble when the highlight of your film is a guy fresh out of prison. Talk about setting the bar low!.
• Headline: Review/Film; Teen-Age Mutant Ninja Seals, Grown Up and in the Navy. Impact: The introduction of 'Teen-Age Mutant Ninja Seals' could have altered the course of marine biology, inspiring a generation to study sea life, though mostly just to make bad puns about it.. Fact: If you think the concept of ninja seals is ridiculous, just remember that real-life seals are known for their incredible intelligence, which is clearly wasted on the plot of this movie..