MAY 24, 1989

Full News Archive

• Headline: Sommers Rosen Inc. Rebranding Announcement. Impact: The renaming of Sommers Rosen Inc. to Shapson, Gero & Sommers Inc. set off a chain reaction in the marketing world. This seemingly trivial event led to a decade-long trend of companies changing their names to include 'Inc.' for that prestigious, corporate feel. Soon, every garage band and dog-walking service followed suit, causing an identity crisis among actual Inc.s. Fact: Did you know that the most common reason for changing a company name is to avoid bad Yelp reviews? Apparently, 'Sommers Rosen' got a few too many 'meh' ratings.
• Headline: Manhattan,inc. Awards Advertising Account to Lotas. Impact: Manhattan,inc.'s decision to hire Lotas Minard Patton McIver caused a ripple effect in the advertising community, leading to the creation of a new trend where companies would let their ads go homeless for over a year. This gave rise to the 'Free Agent' advertising movement, where agencies would compete to adopt lost accounts like stray pets. Fact: Fun fact: The budget for this account was never set, likely because no one wanted to admit the previous agency spent it all on fancy coffee and office plants.
• Headline: Leadership Changes in Media Advertising. Impact: The appointment of Ann Kohl and Susan Nathan as senior vice presidents led to a sudden surge in motivational posters in the office, as they felt compelled to 'inspire' the team. This trend culminated in the infamous 90s slogan 'Hang in There' cat poster, which still haunts cubicles today. Fact: Did you know that the role of a senior vice president is 99% meetings and 1% actual work? It's basically being a professional email sender.
• Headline: THE MEDIA BUSINESS: Advertising; Accounts. Impact: Avis Service Inc.'s shift to Lowe Tucker Metcalf with a hefty budget led to an unprecedented rise in oil change puns in advertising circles. This ultimately birthed a generation of mechanics who moonlighted as stand-up comedians, bringing the art of oil change humor to the forefront of American culture. Fact: Did you know that $3 million is actually the budget for one fancy coffee machine in the advertising world? The oil change? Just an afterthought.
• Headline: THE MEDIA BUSINESS: Advertising; Whitehall Labs And Esty Split. Impact: The split between Whitehall Labs and Campbell-Mithun-Esty over 'philosophical differences' sparked a movement where agencies began to write their breakup letters as press releases. This led to a boom in public relations courses on 'How to End a Working Relationship Without Saying 'We Just Didn't Click.'. Fact: Citing 'philosophical differences' is the corporate equivalent of saying 'It's not you, it's me.' Spoiler alert: it's definitely you.
• Headline: THE MEDIA BUSINESS: Advertising; Nike and Agency Get Art Directors Awards. Impact: Nike and Wieden & Kennedy dominating the Art Directors Club awards created a paradigm shift in advertising creativity. Soon, every agency felt they had to hire at least one art school dropout who thought wearing berets made them more artistic, leading to the rise of hipster ads featuring artisanal oil changes. Fact: Did you know that the 'bean-counter mentality' is just a fancy way of saying 'We care more about the budget than your creativity'? So, keep those bean counters away from the crayons!.
• Headline: Review/Film; Indiana Jones in Pursuit of Dad and the Grail. Impact: Indiana Jones's quest for the Holy Grail not only entertained millions but also inadvertently inspired a generation of fathers to take their sons on archaeological digs, leading to a decline in family vacations and a rise in dirt-filled backyards. Fact: Fun fact: The Holy Grail has been sought after for centuries, but no one ever thought to check the local Starbucks. It's a long shot, but you never know.
• Headline: Market Place; Why Hilton Hints He Might Sell. Impact: Barron Hilton's incessant chatter about selling his company created a panic among hotel chains worldwide, leading to a series of bizarre reality TV shows where hoteliers attempted to outdo each other in ridiculous selling tactics. The 'Hottest Hotel Sale' show was a real flop. Fact: Did you know that Barron Hilton's secret to sales is just talking about selling all the time? It's like how you get fit by just saying the word 'exercise' repeatedly!.
• Headline: Indiana Jones in Pursuit of Dad and the Grail. Impact: The Dow's decline due to inflation fears kicked off a long-standing tradition in Wall Street of using overly dramatic metaphors for market movements. This led to financial analysts comparing stock drops to everything from Titanic sinkings to soap opera deaths. Fact: Did you know that stock market analysts actually have a secret competition to see who can come up with the most ridiculous metaphor? It's the only contest where losing means you get the most views!.
• Headline: Dow Sinks 24.01 Points on Inflation Fears.