APRIL 10, 1989

Full News Archive

• Headline: Revolutionizing Tennis with New Racquet Designs. Impact: This headline sparked a worldwide movement towards inclusivity in sports, leading to the creation of the 'Slightly Overweight Tennis Association' (SOTA), where players compete in stylish sweatbands and elastic waistbands. The fashion revolution that followed paved the way for yoga pants to become acceptable in all public settings, including weddings and funerals.. Fact: Did you know that the average tennis racquet weighs about 10 ounces? That's roughly the same weight as your average slice of cake, which is probably what you should be focused on instead of tennis..
• Headline: Safety First in Challenge Series. Impact: This corporate cocktail party marked the beginning of the 'Corporate Fitness Culture' that led to the invention of the treadmill desk, which in turn resulted in millions of employees pretending to work while actually just walking in place. The ensuing rise in office injuries from tripping over power cords has since been the basis for countless HR training videos.. Fact: Did you know that 'networking' at these events often involves more awkward small talk than actual business deals? It's basically a glorified high school reunion, minus the fun and plus a lot more overpriced hors d'oeuvres..