MARCH 15, 1989

Full News Archive

• Headline: Market Stability Before Trade Report Release. Impact: If only investors had known that 'unchanged' would become the new euphemism for 'we're all just waiting for the apocalypse', they might have invested in something a little more stable, like Beanie Babies or pet rocks.. Fact: Did you know that waiting for trade figures is basically a stock market version of watching paint dry? Exciting stuff, folks!.
• Headline: Banks Accused of Discrimination in New Accounts. Impact: The banks being called out for bias led to a series of regulations. Who knew that calling out discrimination would eventually lead to a whole movement? It’s like they stumbled into a social justice timeline by accident.. Fact: Fun fact: Banks discriminating against minorities is about as surprising as finding out that water is wet. Welcome to the world of finance!.
• Headline: AT&T's Transformation in Rate Regulation. Impact: AT&T. setting their own rates sounds like a recipe for disaster. It's almost as if they thought, 'Let's make our customers pay more for the privilege of being on hold for 45 minutes!' This paved the way for modern telecom nightmares.. Fact: Did you know that AT&T. was once known for their innovative customer service? Just kidding! They were always great at making you feel like a forgotten voicemail..