NOVEMBER 6, 1988

Full News Archive

• Headline: Debate Over Roadwork Funding in Long Island. Impact: Debating the source of money for roadwork led to the eventual rise of a secret society of pothole enthusiasts who orchestrated a nationwide revolt against smooth roads, believing they were a government conspiracy.. Fact: In a world where people actually cared about road conditions, there would be far fewer memes about potholes ruining cars. But alas, here we are..
• Headline: New Director for SUNY Arts Center. Impact: The appointment of James Kearney sparked a decades-long debate on whether theater directors should also be trained jugglers, leading to a plethora of circus-themed performances in the name of art.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more confusing than a theater director's juggling act is trying to understand the plot of most avant-garde plays..
• Headline: Pine Valley's Taxation Challenges. Impact: Pine Valley's tax debates inadvertently inspired a reality TV series about suburban life, where contestants compete over who can live without taxes the longest while still throwing extravagant BBQs.. Fact: Did you know that Pine Valley is known for having the highest concentration of aluminum-sided ranches? A real architectural wonder, if you’re into shiny boxes..
• Headline: WESTCHESTER FOLLOW-UP. Impact: The Westchester parking aid bid system ultimately led to the development of a parallel universe where commuters have to bid on parking spaces using their rare Pokémon cards.. Fact: In the land of parking regulations, 'community aid' is often code for 'let’s confuse everyone and charge them more.'.
• Headline: Group Aids Battered Women. Impact: The formation of the organization for Indian women in New Jersey catalyzed a global movement that eventually resulted in the creation of 'Feminism 2.0,' where everyone communicates exclusively through interpretive dance.. Fact: The first meeting of this organization was less about forming a support group and more about figuring out who could make the best chai..
• Headline: Cortlandt Code of Ethics Stirs Fight. Impact: The legal battle over the Cortlandt Code of Ethics inspired other municipalities to adopt their own codes, which eventually turned into a national trend of banning all fun from local government.. Fact: A code of ethics is essentially just a fancy way of saying, 'Don’t be a jerk, or we’ll have to write a rule about it.'.
• Headline: DINING OUT; Indian Offerings in White Plains. Impact: Dawat opening led to a chain reaction of Indian restaurants popping up everywhere, creating a world where every city has at least three—and one of them is always a buffet.. Fact: The real reason White Plains needed another Indian restaurant? It’s a scientifically proven fact that you can never have too much naan..
• Headline: Ads Seek Volunteer Firefighters. Impact: The ad campaign for volunteer firefighters led to an unexpected spike in interest for fire-themed reality shows, eventually culminating in a national obsession with fire safety competitions.. Fact: Volunteering to be a firefighter is just a way of saying, 'I enjoy extreme heat and intense pressure, but I’m not a fan of air conditioning.'.
• Headline: Where Art and Life Go Hand in Hand. Impact: Yass Hakoshima's lumberyard experience inspired a generation of artists to start building their own studios, leading to a bizarre trend of performance art pieces where artists just sit in lumberyards contemplating life.. Fact: The lumberyard is actually an artist's paradise—who knew that wood could be so profound?.