JULY 8, 1988

Full News Archive

• Headline: Preservation of Historic Landscapes in Poughkeepsie. Impact: The preservation of historic landscapes led to a sudden spike in real estate prices, as everyone wanted to live next to a 'historic' patch of grass. Now, people are spending millions for the privilege of saying they live near a 'historically significant weed.'. Fact: Poughkeepsie once had a thriving market for lawn gnomes, but they were deemed too modern and unworthy of preservation efforts. Who knew gnomes had such a strong lobby?.
• Headline: Technovillain and Romantic Ghostly Encounter. Impact: The film's awkward blend of horror and romance inspired a generation of filmmakers to create a new genre: 'Romantic Horror-Comedy for the Underachieving.' Who knew that the way to true love involved dodging ghosts and awkward plot points?. Fact: Psychic teenagers have been a popular trope since the '80s, proving once again that if you're going to have supernatural abilities, you might as well use them to find love instead of solving world crises..
• Headline: Mau-Mau Uprising in Film and Review. Impact: The Mau-Mau tensions became a cinematic staple, reminding viewers that even historical struggles can be reduced to a melodramatic plot twist. Thanks to this film, misunderstandings about 1950s colonial tensions now come with a side of popcorn.. Fact: The Mau-Mau rebellion was one of the first instances of a group using social media—through pamphlets—to spread their message. Take that, hashtag activism!.
• Headline: Review/Film; Moore and Minnelli in 'Arthur 2'. Impact: The tragic downfall of a rich alcoholic became a cautionary tale for future generations, warning them that money can’t buy happiness, but it can certainly fund some hilarious misadventures. Now, every rich person has a 'Arthur 2' moment before their inevitable downfall.. Fact: The original movie was considered so impactful that it sparked a nationwide movement for 'alcoholic rehabilitation for the rich.' Because clearly, they need more attention than regular folks..
• Headline: Disposal of Hospital Waste: A Struggle Over Regulation. Impact: The struggle over hospital waste regulation led to the establishment of strict laws that ultimately resulted in a bizarre black market for 'clean' hospital waste. Now, people are hoarding medical debris like it's gold, proving that desperation knows no bounds.. Fact: Before regulations, some hospitals used to treat waste disposal like an extreme sport, seeing how far they could throw it without getting fined. Spoiler: They didn’t win any awards for creativity..