NOVEMBER 22, 1987

Full News Archive

• Headline: Travel's Impact on Marcia Brown's Art. Impact: Marcia Brown's travels inspired her art, which in turn sparked a global trend of artists using travel as a muse. This led to the creation of countless mediocre travel blogs, resulting in an explosion of 'influencer' culture, where everyone's a 'digital nomad' sipping lattes in Bali. Fact: Did you know that Marcia Brown's work led to the rise of colorful children's books that no kid ever actually reads? They just end up collecting dust while parents wish they could go on a vacation instead.
• Headline: Brighten Your Winter with Bulbs. Impact: The trend of forcing bulbs in winter became a popular pastime, eventually leading to the rise of indoor gardening influencers who create elaborate prize-winning Instagram feeds, making everyone feel inadequate about their own sad little houseplants. Fact: Did you know that forcing bulbs is basically the gardening equivalent of putting your kids in front of a screen to keep them busy? Both may look good on paper, but the aftermath is usually messy!.
• Headline: RACE-CAR DRIVER STRESSES SAFETY. Impact: A. J. (Buddy) Pugliese's safety advocacy in racing led to an unexpected wave of safety measures in extreme sports. Ironically, this made cheerleading the most dangerous sport, as it now required helmets and safety nets. Fact: Did you know that race-car drivers often have to deal with more safety regulations than a kid in kindergarten? They should really just put them all in bubble wrap.
• Headline: THE TALK OF GM; EMBARKING ON A NEW ERA IN NORTH TARRYTOWN. Impact: General Motors' new era in North Tarrytown marked the beginning of an automotive renaissance, which ultimately led to the rise of electric scooters as the transportation of choice for hipsters everywhere. The irony is delicious. Fact: Did you know that lunch in the car industry is just as important as the cars themselves? After all, performance on a full stomach is the real secret to innovation!.
• Headline: Freeholders Seek Rail Investigation. Impact: The rail investigation sparked a nationwide obsession with safety in transportation, leading to the invention of the 'safety dance' that every train conductor now performs before they leave the station. It's a sight to behold. Fact: Did you know that New Jersey has more derailments than successful dates? Maybe it’s time to invest in some relationship counseling for those trains.
• Headline: Coming to Grips With Crack Abuse. Impact: The conversation around crack abuse spurred an ongoing dialogue that eventually led to the creation of more supportive community programs, which ironically now attract more people looking for free snacks than actual support. Fact: Did you know that community soup kitchens often serve as the best networking events? Who knew a bowl of soup could lead to such profound connections?.
• Headline: Bringing Food and the Hungry Together. Impact: Night courts' unpopularity created a domino effect where states began to phase out inconvenient court hours, leading to an explosion of civil disputes resolved over brunch, because nothing says 'justice' like mimosas. Fact: Did you know that night courts were really just a ploy to keep lawyers awake? Apparently, coffee and legal disputes are a match made in heaven.
• Headline: State Courts Find Night Hours Unpopular.