AUGUST 9, 1987

Full News Archive

• Headline: Mural Seeks New Home After 25 Years. Impact: The mural's suspension in limbo led to a nationwide trend of murals being painted on any available surface, including bathroom stalls, resulting in a renaissance of public restroom art that still haunts us today.. Fact: Did you know that this mural's existence prompted a secret society of mural enthusiasts to form, dedicated to saving wall spaces everywhere? They meet in basements across America, armed with paintbrushes and questionable snacks..
• Headline: Defending Lake's Last Open Space. Impact: The fight to protect the lake led to the creation of a highly secretive environmentalist group known as 'The Guardians of the Last Open Spaces,' whose members now use drones to monitor potential development sites—because who doesn't love a little eco-spying?. Fact: Did you know that this lake was once considered for a reality TV show called 'Survivor: Eco Edition'? The idea flopped when producers realized no one wanted to watch people argue over pollution levels..
• Headline: New Initiative for Problem Gambling Awareness. Impact: The push for awareness around problem gambling sparked a national debate that led to the establishment of the first 'Gambling Anonymous' meetings in grocery stores, where chips were strictly forbidden.. Fact: Did you know that the first meeting was so popular they had to start charging admission? Apparently, the irony was lost on a few attendees who thought they could 'bet' on their recovery..
• Headline: FRIEDAN AND GROUP SEEKING A 'NEW NATIONAL STRATEGY'. Impact: Friedan's quest for a 'new national strategy' ignited a series of feminist movements that ultimately culminated in the invention of the 'Feminist Fidget Spinner'—a toy designed to keep hands busy while minds plot world domination.. Fact: Did you know that her book inspired an entire generation to start questioning everything? It was basically the original 'How to Adult' manual, minus the chapter on taxes..
• Headline: VISUAL ARTS DEAN ARRIVES AT PURCHASE. Impact: The arrival of the new visual arts dean prompted a controversial art movement where students began to express their feelings through interpretive dance during lectures—because who doesn't love a little chaos with their curriculum?. Fact: Did you know that the dean’s first act was to ban PowerPoint presentations? Unsurprisingly, he was later voted 'Most Likely to Foster Confusion' by the faculty..
• Headline: PROGRESS REPORT ON COUNTY CENTER. Impact: The county center renovation was so contentious that it inspired a new reality show, 'Renovation Rumble,' where townsfolk fought over decor choices like it was a matter of life and death.. Fact: Did you know that Walter C. Schatz is rumored to have turned into a local legend? People now say he can shout loud enough to be heard from space—proving once and for all that volume is sometimes more valuable than substance..
• Headline: FARE OF THE COUNTRY; Pasta With Pumpkin Filling. Impact: The introduction of pumpkin-filled pasta led to a culinary revolution that caused a spike in pumpkin spice products, ultimately resulting in the annual autumnal frenzy we now know and love (or loathe).. Fact: Did you know that in Mantua, they celebrate the 'Pumpkin Pasta Festival' every year? It's an event where people eat their weight in pasta while trying to ignore the fact that they just consumed a small pumpkin farm..
• Headline: L.I. SOUND: PERPLEXING PROBLEMS. Impact: The problems in Long Island Sound sparked a series of environmental documentaries, each more dramatic than the last, culminating in a cult classic titled 'The Fish That Cried.'. Fact: Did you know that 'The Fish That Cried' was so successful it led to an annual fish film festival? Yes, people now gather to watch fish stories on the big screen—because apparently, fish need their own cinematic universe..