SEPTEMBER 21, 1986

Full News Archive

• Headline: Investing in Mutual Funds During Market Dips. Impact: The advice to invest in mutual funds during a scary market led to more cautious investors, which in turn caused a shortage of speculative stocks and ultimately created a new species of cautious investor: the 'fundamentalist investor' who only buys based on how safe it feels.. Fact: Investing in mutual funds can be scary, much like going to a haunted house—except in this case, the ghosts are your money disappearing..
• Headline: DO'S AND DON'TS FOR HIRING. Impact: The do's and don'ts for hiring housekeepers influenced a generation of employers to start creating job descriptions longer than the average novel, resulting in the employment agency boom of the late 90s. This caused a surge in job seekers with PhDs in 'Housekeeping Studies.'. Fact: Fun fact: The longest job description in history was for a position that didn’t even exist. The position? An 'Executive Coffee Maker.'.
• Headline: STEPS DETERMINING IF A HOME IS AFFECTED. Impact: The steps for homeowners to test radon levels resulted in a nationwide obsession with home inspections, leading to reality shows where home inspectors hilariously uncover hidden dangers, like the infamous 'Deadly Basement Butterflies.'. Fact: Radon is like that one annoying houseguest—you never know how dangerous they are until they’ve overstayed their welcome..
• Headline: MORATORIUM IN VALLEY STREAM. Impact: The moratorium in Valley Stream on building high-rises led to an unexpected urban sprawl, as residents suddenly took up the hobby of 'urban camping' in their living rooms due to cramped spaces—who knew that could be a trend?. Fact: A moratorium is just a fancy way of saying 'let's hit the pause button on our bad decisions for just a moment.'.
• Headline: 4-H: MORE THAN JUST ANIMALS. Impact: The expansion of 4-H clubs into various fields encouraged kids to explore careers beyond agriculture, resulting in the wild idea that kids might actually enjoy learning about something other than cows, which consequently led to the rise of the 'Minecraft Architect.'. Fact: 4-H isn't just about cows and crops; it's also about learning life skills—like how to survive a zombie apocalypse using only a pitchfork and a will to succeed..