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HEADLINES ON May 14, 1985
Full News Archive
- Headline: Taxing Health Benefits Proposal Unveiled. Impact: Had this tax on health benefits been implemented, it might have sent employers into a frenzy. This could have led to a mass exodus of workers from traditional jobs to gig economies, resulting in the rise of the infamous 'side hustle' culture we endure today. Thanks a lot, Treasury!. Fact: In a stunning twist of irony, taxing health benefits might have led to a boom in alternative medicine practices, where people pay in crystals and good vibes instead of cold hard cash. Who needs health insurance when you have a healing crystal?.
- Headline: Former Aide Alleges Landlord Payments. Impact: This revelation about corrupt dealings likely set off a chain reaction of distrust in government officials, leading to the creation of countless conspiracy theories. Today, we have more conspiracy podcasts than actual news. Thanks to this ex-state aide, the world is just a little more paranoid!. Fact: After hearing about these shady payments, you might think that politicians would be more transparent. But let's be honest: if they were, we’d have nothing to gossip about during family dinners!.
Wall Street Time Machine
JNJ
Johnson & Johnson
Johnson & Johnson - If you invested $1,000 in 1985, it would be worth $246,803 today (246.8x return)
MCD
McDonald's
McDonald's - If you invested $1,000 in 1985, it would be worth $242,284 today (242.3x return)
AAPL
Apple
Apple - If you invested $1,000 in 1985, it would be worth $2,853,286 today (2853.3x return)