MARCH 31, 1985

Full News Archive

• Headline: Nutritionist Shares Everest Climbing Experience. Impact: Priscilla's Everest experience inspired a global trend of extreme diets. Now, instead of climbing mountains, people just climb aboard the latest health craze—like the 'Mount Kale' diet. Who knew a doughnut could lead to quinoa avalanches?. Fact: The only thing more difficult than climbing Everest is finding a decent avocado toast at the base camp..
• Headline: Bribery Concerns in Liquor Sales. Impact: Russell's confusion over liquor prices sparked a secret underground economy where overpriced drinks became the latest currency. Who needs Bitcoin when you can have 'Bourbon Bucks'?. Fact: In a shocking twist, liquor prices have been known to fluctuate more than political opinions during election season..
• Headline: Columbia's Transformation Along Route 66. Impact: The 'For Sale' signs led to a real estate boom that turned the quiet town into a tourist trap. Now, visitors come for the charming views and leave with overpriced knickknacks. Thanks, gentrification!. Fact: Columbia was once known for its tranquility until house hunters discovered it was a great place to 'invest' in their anxiety..
• Headline: ANTIQUES; 10 GUIDES TO COLLECTING AMERICANA. Impact: William's tips on investing in antiques led to a nationwide obsession with collecting junk. Now, basements are filled with 'vintage' items that are worth less than the dust on them.. Fact: Collecting antiques is just another way of saying, 'I have no idea what to do with my life, but this lamp looks old and sad.'.
• Headline: IN WASHINGTON, A 'NEW CHEMISTRY'. Impact: The Connecticut delegation's bonding moment led to a session of bipartisan brunches. Who knew that sharing mimosas could lead to actual progress on policy? We should've tried this sooner!. Fact: The only chemistry Congress is known for is the one that occurs when they all get together to ignore the real issues..
• Headline: LIGHTS! CAMERA! FOG!. Impact: The Academy Award ceremony sparked a trend in Hollywood where every filmmaker now thinks fog is a crucial element for drama. Spoiler alert: it's not. But hey, as long as it looks artsy!. Fact: Sally Field's acceptance speech was so foggy that even the teleprompter needed a compass to find its way through..
• Headline: PSYCHIATRIC CARE CLOSE TO HOME. Impact: This particular case of mental health awareness paved the way for a wave of community programs. People began to realize that taking care of your mind is just as important as taking care of your Instagram feed.. Fact: This woman's recovery story inspired a million hashtags, because nothing says 'mental health matters' like a perfectly filtered selfie..
• Headline: NEW JERSEYANS. Impact: Ramona's legacy of social justice led to a whole generation of activists who now think they can solve the world's problems with a Facebook post and a protest sign. Spoiler: they can't.. Fact: Cuban independence is cool and all, but it’s really just a footnote in the saga of how New Jerseyans love to complain about everything..
• Headline: PRESIDENT FORD SPEAKS AT PURCHASE. Impact: Ford's comments about the economy sparked a nationwide delusion that everything was fine. This illusion lasted until the next economic downturn, proving that optimism is just a fancy word for denial.. Fact: Ford’s understanding of fiscal health was so optimistic that even a finance major would have raised an eyebrow. But hey, who doesn’t love a good pep talk?.