SEPTEMBER 10, 1982

Full News Archive

• Headline: Old Tables and Modern Knees. Impact: The downfall of sturdy, time-tested furniture began with this headline, leading to a world where IKEA exists, and now people have to decipher cryptic assembly instructions while wondering why their couch collapses at the slightest touch.. Fact: Did you know that the earliest known chairs date back to ancient Egypt? They were quite the status symbol, unlike the flimsy folding chairs you'll find at your cousin's backyard barbecue..
• Headline: Jason Thompson's Unusual Game Arrival. Impact: Jason Thompson arriving late may have sparked a chain reaction of players developing a dangerous trend: arriving just in time to miss warm-ups, which ultimately led to the invention of the 'walk-off home run' as a desperate ploy to salvage dignity.. Fact: Did you know that baseball players are known to have superstitions? Maybe Thompson was just ensuring he didn't accidentally step on a crack and break his mother's back!.
• Headline: Pam Shriver's Practice Court Moment. Impact: Pam Shriver's practice session was the catalyst for a new trend in tennis: spectators becoming more interested in player drama than the actual game, paving the way for reality shows disguised as sports.. Fact: Did you know that Pam Shriver was a doubles champion? Maybe the spectators were just hoping for a dramatic serve... or a scandalous gossip!.
• Headline: AMERICAN INDIANS' ARTISTRY IN BASKETS. Impact: The exhibition of American Indian basketry led to a resurgent interest in artisan crafts, which eventually brought about hipster culture and the rise of overpriced artisan basket stores where you can buy a 'vintage' basket for your organic quinoa.. Fact: Did you know that basket weaving is considered one of the oldest crafts? It’s been around long enough to see trends come and go, unlike your last Instagram post..
• Headline: HERS. Impact: The dread of meeting June Allyson may have led to an entire generation of people avoiding celebrity encounters, which spiraled into a world where everyone now hides behind their screens instead of facing reality.. Fact: Did you know June Allyson was an actress and singer? A little less drama in her life might have kept her fans from developing a fear of meeting their idols..
• Headline: HELPFUL HARDWARE; EFFICIENT HELPERS FOR GARDENERS. Impact: The introduction of helpful gardening tools might have inadvertently set off a suburban arms race, leading to the emergence of overzealous gardeners equipped with more gadgets than a Swiss Army knife.. Fact: Did you know that garden gnomes have been around since the 19th century? Maybe they’re the original 'helpful helpers'—or just nosy neighbors with pointy hats!.