JUNE 16, 1982

Full News Archive

• Headline: Exploring Modern Oriental Rugs. Impact: If only people had known that obsessively shopping for rugs would lead to a global shortage of home decor ideas, we might have invented the minimalist aesthetic 50 years earlier. Thanks, Oriental rugs, for cluttering our lives and our Instagram feeds.. Fact: Did you know that every time someone buys an Oriental rug, a hipster somewhere is forced to reconsider their entire life choices? That's the true cost of luxury..
• Headline: Staining Oak for Mission Style Furniture. Impact: The rise of mission oak furniture inadvertently sparked a nationwide obsession with all things rustic. Now, every coffee shop has reclaimed wood tables, and everyone thinks they're a carpenter—thanks to those Spanish missions.. Fact: Fun fact: 'Mission oak' is just a fancy way of saying 'we didn't want to pay for good wood.'.
• Headline: The Challenges of Motherhood in Sports. Impact: When mothers realized the rules were changing but the job stayed the same, they inadvertently set off a chain reaction that led to the rise of the modern parenting blog. Now everyone feels obligated to share their 'expert' advice on raising children.. Fact: Pro tip: If you're a mother, you can skip the parenting books and just take notes from the nearest park. Trust me, it's a goldmine of real-life experience..
• Headline: EXHIBITS FEATURE PAPERMAKING ART. Impact: Hand papermaking art exhibitions led to the surprising resurgence of DIY crafts among millennials, sparking a generation of people who think they can sell homemade greeting cards for a living. Thanks to this, we now have more Etsy shops than actual buyers.. Fact: Did you know that 90% of handmade paper is just recycled junk mail? So when you buy that artisanal card, you're really just supporting the recycling industry!.
• Headline: HERS. Impact: The realization that New York is only for the very young led to an existential crisis among anyone over 30 living there. This paved the way for overpriced 'adulting' classes and self-help books that no one asked for.. Fact: Fun fact: In New York, once you hit 25, you automatically qualify for a senior citizen discount on existential dread..
• Headline: HELPFUL HARDWARE; FOR SPORTS EQUIPMENT. Impact: Helpful hardware tips for sports equipment inadvertently made everyone think they could become the next big sports star. Now your neighbor is trying to turn their garage into a mini Olympic training facility. Good luck with that!. Fact: Did you know that the average person spends more time organizing their sports equipment than actually playing sports? Who knew tidiness was the real MVP?.