FEBRUARY 3, 1982

Full News Archive

• Headline: Summer Job Opportunities in Recession. Impact: Students, desperate for summer jobs, start a trend of extreme couponing, leading to a world where people barter with expired coupons. Economists call it the 'Coupon Craze of 2030'.. Fact: In recession markets, people often find jobs that are less about skills and more about who can outlast the most rounds of coffee-fueled interviews. Good luck!.
• Headline: Rug Workshops at Cooper-Hewitt Museum. Impact: The rug workshops at Cooper-Hewitt inspire a global rug renaissance, causing an unexpected rise in hipster rug-making competitions. Who knew weaving could be so... competitive?. Fact: Rug making has been a way to avoid adult responsibilities for centuries. It's basically the 'Netflix and chill' of medieval times..
• Headline: Reviving Historic Ironwork Designs. Impact: The restoration of ironwork ignites a passion for architectural preservation, resulting in a bizarre trend where people start hoarding rusty iron railings and calling them 'vintage art'.. Fact: Ironwork is so important that if it were a person, it would probably be the overachiever in your class who ends up running a tech startup..
• Headline: HERS. Impact: Molly Haskell's column evolves into a feminist manifesto, leading to a series of 'Hers' spin-offs that eventually create a multi-billion dollar industry in women-centric media. Talk about girl power!. Fact: The 'Hers' column proves that while men have been writing forever, women were just busy plotting their takeover of the literary world..
• Headline: WITNESSES SOUGHT IN KILLING AT COLUMBIA CAMPUS. Impact: The tragic killing at Columbia sparks a wave of campus security reforms, leading to an era where every university feels like a fortress. Students wonder if they're getting an education or a crash course in survival.. Fact: Columbia's campus security measures became so elaborate that it became a popular backdrop for action movie scenes. Who knew education could be so thrilling?.
• Headline: IN NOVEL CUSTODY SETUP, PARENTS ALTERNATE CARE. Impact: The unique custody setup inspires a new trend of co-parenting workshops that lead to a reality show called 'Divorced but Still Friends', which becomes the next big hit on TV. Because who needs dignity?. Fact: Alternating care might sound like a novel idea but it's basically what pets have been doing for years. Pets, however, are much better at it..