MARCH 1, 1981

Full News Archive

• Headline: Long Beach's Progressive Transformation. Impact: This 'new look' initiated a never-ending cycle of city councils trying to outdo each other with flashy renovations, leading to the inevitable 'ugly building syndrome' that plagues many urban areas today.. Fact: Fun fact: 'New Look' is also the name of a fashion line, which probably explains why city councils are so obsessed with aesthetics. Can't wait for the runway shows!.
• Headline: Reasons to Preserve Scarsdale's Volunteer System. Impact: The debate over this system sparked a national trend of citizen-led initiatives, ultimately leading to reality TV shows like 'Survivor: Local Government Edition.' Who knew democracy could be so entertaining?. Fact: In Scarsdale, citizen volunteers are basically the Avengers of local governance. Just imagine them showing up in capes for town hall meetings!.
• Headline: NOW HEAR THIS. Impact: The Reagan Administration's stance on Soviet expansionism set off a chain reaction of geopolitics that ultimately led to every single high school history class making students cringe over Cold War discussions for decades.. Fact: Did you know that Reagan once thought ketchup was a vegetable? Imagine what his foreign policy ideas must have been like!.
• Headline: DDT BURIED NEAR BARNEGAT BAY. Impact: The burial of DDT drums became a cautionary tale in environmentalism, paving the way for stricter regulations and the eventual rise of organic gardening—because no one wants their tomatoes tasting like a chemical spill.. Fact: DDT was once so popular that it was basically the 'superfood' of pesticides. Who knew being a little too good at killing pests would lead to such a mess?.
• Headline: 500 PLAYERS OF ALL AGES TAKE A BREATH FOR RECORDER FESTIVAL. Impact: The recorder festival somehow created a resurgence in interest for other forgotten instruments—next thing you know, the triangle will be headlining its own festival. Watch out, world!. Fact: The recorder is often dubbed 'the instrument of choice for people who want to annoy their parents.' Just imagine 500 of them at once!.
• Headline: Dining Out; CHANGE IS LOW-KEYED AND SIMPLE. Impact: This subtle restaurant rebranding sparked a trend of 'new' eateries that are just old ones in disguise, leading to a national identity crisis among diners who can’t remember where they ate last week.. Fact: Tatters was just last year's Alexander's? Sounds like a new trend in dining—'the culinary reincarnation.' Bon appétit!.
• Headline: Gardening; ORCHID NOT JUST A HOTHOUSE FLOWER. Impact: The push for orchids as 'not just hothouse flowers' led to a global obsession with exotic plants, making gardeners everywhere feel inadequate for not having a mini jungle in their living rooms.. Fact: Orchids are so trendy that they’ve even inspired a dating app—'OrchidMatch,' where you can swipe right on your favorite blooms!.
• Headline: The Lively Arts; ADDING GEOMETRIC ENERGY TO DANCE. Impact: The introduction of geometric energy into dance led to a bizarre evolution of interpretive dance that now includes yoga poses, making audiences wonder if they should be applauding or calling for a chiropractor.. Fact: Geometric energy in dance? Just wait until they introduce calculus. I can see it now: 'The Integral of Movement.'.
• Headline: SPORTS EVENT TAXES HARTFORD'S STAMINA. Impact: The pressure of hosting a sports event led Hartford to invest in infrastructure, which sparked a city-wide fitness craze, inspiring every couch potato to think they could run marathons.. Fact: Imagine 200 figure skaters in one place. That’s more sequins than an old Hollywood movie set. I hope someone brought a vacuum!.