DECEMBER 24, 1979

Full News Archive

• Headline: Senators Shape Foreign Aid in Cambodia. Impact: As Congress flexed its muscles in foreign policy, a butterfly flapped its wings in Cambodia, leading to an unexpected increase in hipster coffee shops in Washington, D.C. Who knew foreign aid could brew lattes?. Fact: Did you know that Congress has the power to influence foreign policy? Shocking, right? I thought they just argued over lunch menus..
• Headline: Eisner's Economic Solutions for Inflation. Impact: Eisner's tax proposal led to a nationwide obsession with gasoline prices, ultimately causing the invention of the 'gasoline tax conspiracy theory,' which has since fueled many a late-night talk show.. Fact: Fun fact: If you ever wanted to see inflation and unemployment tango, just look at the oil market. They’re the worst dance partners ever..
• Headline: Houston's Rabies Outbreak: Stray Hunt Initiated. Impact: The rabies outbreak sparked a nationwide campaign to keep pets indoors, resulting in a surge of cat videos on the internet. Thanks, rabies!. Fact: Did you know rabies is a viral disease that can be fatal? It’s just as charming as it sounds..
• Headline: State Politics Termed Factor in Hunter Vote. Impact: The political machinations behind the Hunter College presidency selection led to the realization that college politics are just as messy as high school gossip, but with more committee meetings.. Fact: Did you know that college presidents are often chosen based on who has the most connections? It’s like a game of musical chairs, but with tenured professors..
• Headline: Around the Nation. Impact: The crash investigation resulted in stricter regulations, leading to the birth of a new genre of reality TV: 'Cops and Crashes,' where everyone gets to feel like an investigative journalist.. Fact: Fun fact: Crash investigations are like reality shows without the dramatic music, except the stakes are way higher. Stay safe out there!.
• Headline: Soviet Nuclear Test Reported. Impact: The Soviet nuclear test pushed the world closer to the Cold War brink, ultimately giving rise to the phrase 'duck and cover' and an entire generation of kids who thought hiding under desks was a survival strategy.. Fact: Did you know that nuclear tests are so 20th century? Now we just worry about social media fallout instead..
• Headline: Darryl F. Zanuck, Flamboyant Film Producer, Dead. Impact: Zanuck's death prompted a surge in biopics, leading to the current trend of making movies about everyone who has ever made a movie. Next up: the life story of a popcorn kernel!. Fact: Fun fact: Being a flamboyant film producer means you can wear outrageous clothes and get away with it. Hollywood is the only place where that’s a job requirement!.