AUGUST 19, 1979

Full News Archive

• Headline: Passaic County Seeks Charter Revision. Impact: The charter-revision bid in Passaic led to a series of local government reforms, which eventually inspired a nationwide trend of overly complicated local governance, effectively making every town's council meeting a five-hour saga of confusion and bewilderment. Thanks, Passaic!. Fact: Did you know that the term 'Freeholders' sounds like a fancy way to say 'people who are just really free to make bad decisions'?.
• Headline: McKinsey Alumni in Top Management Roles. Impact: McKinsey & Co. employees taking top management roles elsewhere created an elite circle of consultants-turned-executives who now think they can solve world hunger with a PowerPoint presentation. Spoiler: they can't.. Fact: Did you know that McKinsey's strategy is basically just 'throw a lot of buzzwords at a wall and see what sticks'? It's a real art form..
• Headline: Revitalization of Senegal River Delta Begins. Impact: The Senegal River Delta project laid the groundwork for agricultural advances that would eventually lead to a cornucopia of food, making Senegal the unlikely contender for the 'World's Cornucopia' title—who knew a river dam could lead to a foodie revolution?. Fact: Did you know that this project took 15 years of delays? That's longer than the average time it takes me to decide what to watch on Netflix..
• Headline: How to Ship Home Foreign Purchases. Impact: The shipping advice for foreign purchases led to a boom in online shopping, which in turn resulted in the modern dilemma of how to fit two months' worth of impulse buys into one tiny apartment. Thanks, Customs!. Fact: Did you know that shipping home foreign purchases is basically the adult version of bringing home rocks from vacation? Only now you’re paying for it..
• Headline: Another Way to Raise Cash. Impact: The sale of receivables by companies like Chrysler sparked a financial craze that turned boardrooms into gambling dens where executives started betting on debts like they were playing poker with Monopoly money.. Fact: Did you know that selling consumer debt is like trying to sell your old high school textbooks? No one wants them, but here we are!.
• Headline: Nauvoo, the Town the Mormons Left. Impact: The article on Nauvoo highlights how historical towns can become tourist traps, turning sacred spaces into selfie spots, thus ensuring that the Mormons' legacy is forever intertwined with Instagram filters.. Fact: Did you know that Nauvoo means 'beautiful place' in Hebrew? Irony must have been lost on the Mormons as they packed their bags for Salt Lake City..
• Headline: ART. Impact: The Chinese peasant art exhibit sparked a global appreciation for outsider art, leading many to believe they can now monetize their finger paintings. Spoiler alert: they can't.. Fact: Did you know that 'peasant art' is just a polite way of saying 'art made by people who definitely did not attend art school'?.
• Headline: NEW JERSEY HOUSING. Impact: New Jersey's Home Warranty and Builders' Registration Act became the blueprint for bureaucratic red tape across the nation, ensuring that no one could ever build a house without a twelve-step program of paperwork.. Fact: Did you know that New Jersey's builders now have to register with the state? Because nothing says 'trustworthy' like a government database!.
• Headline: Towns on Mississippi Welcome Carter. Impact: Carter's welcome in Mississippi was the precursor to all future presidential visits being seen as rock concerts, where towns roll out the red carpet and citizens lose their minds over a handshake.. Fact: Did you know that welcoming a president is basically just a glorified town hall meeting where everyone pretends to care about politics for a day?.
• Headline: DINING OUT. Impact: Caffe Puglie's review likely led to a gentrification wave that turned a once-humble eatery into a trendy hotspot, complete with $15 avocado toast served on reclaimed wood.. Fact: Did you know that dining out has become a competitive sport? If you’re not posting about it on social media, did you even eat there?.