MARCH 15, 1979

Full News Archive

• Headline: Ozawa's Masterclass in Shanghai. Impact: Ozawa's mastery and Western performance practices seeped into Shanghai's orchestral fabric, leading to a future where the city would produce a symphony that would attract tourists and accidentally cause a boom in local bubble tea shops. Who knew music could lead to tapioca chaos?. Fact: Seiji Ozawa once conducted a performance so moving, it allegedly made a squirrel cry. True story. Or maybe just a well-placed myth!.
• Headline: Mexican Quake Kills 1, Injures 32,. Impact: This earthquake not only reminded us of nature's wrath but also led to the development of more robust building codes in Mexico, which ironically made structures more resistant to future quakes but still not to the whims of a bad taco.. Fact: The Richter scale was invented by Charles F. Richter, who definitely won the 'Most Likely to Ruin Your Day' award among seismologists..
• Headline: U.S. Is‐Said to. Accept a Direct. Role In Talks on Palestinian Home Rule. Impact: The U.S. involvement in Palestinian talks solidified a pattern of diplomatic interventions that would result in more peace proposals than a Hallmark Christmas movie, but with far fewer happy endings.. Fact: If every U.S. peace proposal were a holiday card, we’d have enough to paper the White House and still have leftovers for the next election cycle..
• Headline: South Africa Strike Ebbs. Impact: The miners' strike's collapse led to a resurgence of mining safety standards, making it paradoxically safer for miners but also ensuring an endless supply of coal for the world's barbecue enthusiasts.. Fact: You can thank these strikes for the phrase 'no coal left behind'—which is totally not a thing but should be!.
• Headline: MANY ARAB NATIONS ASSAIL CAIRO PACT. Impact: Arafat's call for an oil embargo triggered a global panic that led to the rise of alternative energy sources. Years later, hipsters would proudly proclaim their love for renewable energy at local coffee shops.. Fact: Embracing alternative energy is great until you realize your solar panels are less effective than your neighbor's obnoxious Christmas lights during July!.
• Headline: Bill Would Delay Law On Ex‐U.S. Aides’. Impact: The delay in passing ethics laws resulted in the formation of a secret society of former aides who met bi-weekly to discuss how to 'ethically' bend the rules. Spoiler: they didn’t succeed.. Fact: Postponing ethics laws is like saying, 'I’ll start my diet tomorrow'—it never quite happens, but the snacks are always ready..
• Headline: Advertising. Impact: The investigation into national ad claims inadvertently paved the way for a future of fact-checking and the rise of influencers who, ironically, are often less trustworthy than the ads they criticize.. Fact: The reason we have so many fact-checkers today is that people used to believe everything they saw on TV—thankfully, the internet has made misinformation so much more entertaining!.