JANUARY 7, 1979

Full News Archive

• Headline: Navajo Code Talkers: Unbreakable Communication. Impact: If the Navajo code had been broken, the Axis powers might have developed a serious obsession with Native American languages, leading to a bizarre trend in espionage where spies would be sent to summer camps in the Southwest to learn the language. Imagine the Axis powers trying their hand at pottery while failing to decode military secrets!. Fact: The Navajo code was so effective that it took the Japanese until the end of the war to figure out what was going on, which is longer than it takes for most people to figure out how to properly use a microwave..
• Headline: Success in Combating Medicaid Fraud. Impact: If NYC's anti-fraud system had not been adopted, Medicaid fraud might have turned into a national sport. Teams would form, and special leagues would be established, complete with uniforms and sponsorships from questionable pharmaceutical companies.. Fact: Joseph Califano's system was such a hit that it probably inspired future generations of accountants to dream of a career in fraud detection instead of the boring old tax preparation..
• Headline: Investment Strategies: Prudent vs. Speculative. Impact: Investment strategies discussed in 1970s could have led to the invention of an entirely new profession: the 'Financial Time Traveler,' who would jump between decades to exploit economic booms and crashes, leaving a trail of confused investors in their wake.. Fact: The only thing more uncertain than investment strategies in this era was the fact that every future generation would believe they had discovered the 'next big thing'—only to find it was just another fad..
• Headline: Good Children's Films Aren't Child's Play. Impact: If children’s films were truly taken seriously, we might live in a world where Pixar movies are treated like Shakespearean tragedies, analyzed in universities for their profound existential themes.. Fact: It's ironic that the struggle to make good children's films often leads to adults overanalyzing them more than the actual intended audience does..
• Headline: Legislators in Illinois, Under Fire, Defer Part of $8,000 Pay Increases. Impact: The decision to defer pay increases for Illinois legislators could have sparked a nationwide trend of politicians getting creative with their paychecks. Who knows? We might have ended up with a 'pay-per-view' model for political decisions!. Fact: In a shocking twist, the outrage from the public actually worked! Who knew that voicing displeasure over politician salaries could lead to actual change? Next, we’ll see if they start listening to constituents about, I don’t know, actual policy..
• Headline: POINT OF VIEW; Is Treasury the Right Path to the Top?; Too Many Cooks; Allies Take UP Slack; Carter excepted, the major Western heads of state rose by way of financial posts.. Impact: Had Carter's financial expertise been better, we might have avoided the economic turmoil of the 80s, leading to a world where shoulder pads and big hair never went out of style because people were too busy discussing balanced budgets.. Fact: It’s fascinating how many U.S. presidents have been criticized for lacking financial savvy, yet you still can't get a loan for a small business without a full dissertation on your financial history..
• Headline: THE ECONOMIC SCENE. Impact: If the West had not worried about Iranian oil, we might have seen a different global landscape where alternative energy sources were developed 30 years earlier, and scooters became the transport of choice instead of SUVs.. Fact: Funny enough, despite all the worries about oil, people still managed to find a way to argue about gas prices while waiting in line at the pump—because nothing brings people together like shared misery..
• Headline: Business Is Picking Up For Indochina Experts Watching in Bangkok. Impact: The existence of Indochina-watchers may have led to the rise of a new genre of documentary films, chronicling the lives of these dedicated experts while they debated the nuances of foreign policy over cups of instant coffee.. Fact: Having 'Indochina experts' sounds impressive until you realize that they were probably just people who watched too much TV during the Vietnam War and decided to turn their couch opinions into careers..
• Headline: G.O.P. Begins Its Efforts for '80 With Longtime Rifts Left Behind. Impact: The GOP's efforts for the '80 election might have sparked an endless cycle of political infighting that eventually led to reality TV stars stepping into the political arena, forever changing the fabric of American politics.. Fact: Political parties arguing over foreign affairs is like watching a group of cats trying to decide who gets the best sunbeam. It’s messy, and at the end of the day, nothing really gets done..